Alright i was kinda into the self bondage scene and slowly got bored and stopped......
But me and my new friend who happens to be a girl as i happen to be a guy found out that both of us kinda (well really want to get kinky) and i was wondering what cool and neat tricks you lovly people would care to share with me so i could suprise her.....
The key question here is, does she want to get surprised? More information would be helpful so some of the more twisted minds (including myself) can give you a hand.
With the limited information currently available, I suggest finding out exactly what she wants before springing something on her that might turn (or piss) her off. Keep in mind that you will want to do something that makes her feel good, first and foremost. Going beyond certain limits (which you must discover first) will kill that feeling rather quickly.
Well we had a little conversation on what each other likes and she said that she was open to alot of things mostly beacuase she hasent really dove into this kind of stuff yet and she wants to expiriment. but from what ive figured out she would like to be dominated.....
Be carefull with beginners...as a rule of thumb, start slowly. There is always room for "improvements" afterwards.
Many things feel different in reality than in fantasy, and you surely would not want to drive her away from "bondage things" by ruining her first steps.
Be cautious in your exploration of her interests and limits. Once these boundaries are breached, it may be impossible to repair the damage done. As others have mentioned,carefully negotiate and proceed slowly.
I am most afraid of playing with those who lack the experience to be able to precisely communicate their limits. Careful negotiations and discussions prevent bad outcomes. The location, time, and roles are just the beginning. Next on the list is what activities will be involved. Is bondage, discipline, dominance, and/or sadism acceptable? For bondage, what implements are acceptable? Is she fearful of gags? Blindfold? Handcuffs? How accepting is she of bruises? Some cannot accept rope burns on the wrists. Others cannot accept any bruises and bruise easily. Sex and bondage do not necessarily go together. Be very precise in determining what is and is not acceptable. Even the clothing choices should be discussed. Will your outfit scare her or cause her to laugh hysterically? Medical conditions and issues must be thoroughly discussed. Another aspect to carefully discuss is the "Safeword" or "Safewords" to be used during the scene. When approaching limits, some method must be set up well ahead of time. One common method is the color system: red, yellow, green. You may find something else that works well for you.
Proceeding slowly helps to enable future scenes by always leaving both people wanting more. Going too fast could leave horrible memories and ruin any chance of fun in the future. On the other hand, too slow is not good, but is not as bad. The first play scene should be very basic with only one unknown variable. This could be pain tolerance, acceptance of bondage, or some other aspect. Once the first aspect is known, a future scene can involve a new variable. This allows the top to easily figure out what part of the scene is causing a problem and fix it.
With careful negotiations and cautious progression, your chance of success is much higher. Good luck!
for starters, the best would be simple hands behind back, tied with something soft (scarf or soft rope) and a blindfold. Then, make out on the couch until you are both so hot you cannot stand it. Then, use your imagination.
Save the exotic stuff for later. You only need to two scarves for the above, which she probably has in a dresser drawer.
