www.BoundAnna.com

bounddosster wrote:All of the above Dam, I think I've just wet myself laughing.

I use to get parcels delivered by this same nosy delivery man and every time he would comment about what he thought was in the parcel. I would just nod and politely thank him and take the parcel while uttering expletives to myself.

One day I see him coming with a parcel of a three-foot tube and he is all joky Ha, ha, has your wife ordered a new vibrator mate. I told him "no, it's the battery for the old one".

Now you're getting it. Why bother lying, I mean what can he do to you anyway? It would be more damaging to him if he tried anything funny.

bounddosster wrote:I told him "no, it's the battery for the old one"

JIMDINI wrote:Do you think this work with Jehovahs witnesses

Definitely...

Jenny.

as the thread has now wandered off (as usual) I thought I'd recall a story (true) that a good friend of ours told us.

She was making regular trips to the local tip (a.k.a. refuse/re-cycling depot) and one Sunday morning she arrived and started emptying the boot of her car, several black bin liners. It so happened she was wearing a tight black tank-top and tight black leather trousers and leather boots. The young chap working at the site noticed her (hard to misss, actually !) and grinned, saying "not throwing away all your whips?" The day before she had been at an outdoor play event, she is a keen user, and very skilful one at that, of whips of all sizes.

"Oh", she says " you mean these" opening the large bag full of bullwhips. "no, I'm keeping these"

jaw-drop moment...

About jehova's witnesses:

I really get a kick about using a joke in german on the unlikely occasion
One of those witnesses is proactive in distributing the watchtower.

Jehova's witnesses= Zeugen Jehovas in german.

"Zeugende Jehovas" means procastinating jehovas.
If you mumble the last syllable of the 1st word, it takes a while
For the witness to realize what you just said & turn beet-red in sn
Instant.

But i only do this if they actively approach me.

I have literally no idea what to say to the census takers if there dare to knock on my door. The truth will spew from me like a fountain, and I will tilt the US curve. Any advice for that?

lj wrote:as the thread has now wandered off (as usual) I thought I'd recall a story (true) that a good friend of ours told us.

She was making regular trips to the local tip (a.k.a. refuse/re-cycling depot) and one Sunday morning she arrived and started emptying the boot of her car, several black bin liners. It so happened she was wearing a tight black tank-top and tight black leather trousers and leather boots. The young chap working at the site noticed her (hard to misss, actually !) and grinned, saying "not throwing away all your whips?" The day before she had been at an outdoor play event, she is a keen user, and very skilful one at that, of whips of all sizes.

"Oh", she says " you mean these" opening the large bag full of bullwhips. "no, I'm keeping these"

jaw-drop moment...

That reminds me of the old saying:
"Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to"

Tell them that. Will you protect me, Greg? I'm a-scared. Scared I am going to answer whatever questions they ask. I am a terrible liar.

As the great man, W.C.Fields use to say 'If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.' he also said: "Why tell the truth, when with a little embellishment you can bring fun and laughter to life."

I've always thought my life was a funny pile of embellished bullshit.

Shannon SteelSlave wrote:Tell them that. Will you protect me, Greg? I'm a-scared. Scared I am going to answer whatever questions they ask. I am a terrible liar.

Just up the sarcasm tone a bit and tell them the full on truth. They probably won't believe you anyway And if they do realise you are telling the truth, they probably don't care

Shannon SteelSlave wrote:I have literally no idea what to say to the census takers if there dare to knock on my door. The truth will spew from me like a fountain, and I will tilt the US curve. Any advice for that?

Up here in Canuckia we do our census either by mail or on the fed's web thingamajig (what I did last time). Nobody comes to the door anymore,

But think of this - if they come to your door, it's that they have to be there! Jump on the opportunity (but not on the census peeps) and give them their salary's worth . But don't lie! It's frowned upon by the government pencil pushers. Maybe even the pencils themselves...

Yes... I'm getting goofy... all in good fun...

Jenny.

bounddosster wrote:As the great man, W.C.Fields use to say 'If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit.' he also said: "Why tell the truth, when with a little embellishment you can bring fun and laughter to life."

I've always thought my life was a funny pile of embellished bullshit.

W.C.Fields, aka the great mc goniggle.

The 1st anarchistic american comedian captured on film.

"He who hates dogs & little children can't be a bad person"

How provocative a line that is in the early years between the great wars ?

The marx brothers or hellzapoppin wouldn't have happened without WCF.

This is going to end with me firing at the feds from my terrace with a multi barreled mini rotating cannon.

The US Census is done by mail. Just follow the instructions and don't mail it early and you will never see a live census taker. It's only people who don't respond or who send it back early or incomplete that receive that knock on the door.
Oh, and I've never seen a question about your kinks, so no need to lie about that!

Let's go 2 years forward. There was some kind of price guarantee that was included with the package that expires soon, and will add $25 to my bill. I do not wish to pay it, and without pornhub, I hardly see the point in paying for a 100mbps connection. I can have the same bill, but with a 25mbps connection. Any advice? Should I shop around? Do I need 100 mbps?

I'll freely admit that I haven't read the entire thread, so I may not understand your needs. However, I'm someone with 25mbps Internet service. That's quite simply the fastest thing I can get (possible exception for satellite, but the increased lag is undesirable), via radio service here in the sticks.

Unless you're doing a number of things simultaneously, you should be able to a lot on that. A decent 4K video/audio stream is about 15mbps. Netflix doesn't like to kick into 4K without 25 mbps. If you have a service guarantee of 25 mbps and aren't doing other data intensive things, you should be able to consistently streak video in 4K.

My reality was that when 25 mbps service became available here, pretty much everyone in the area jumped on it (coming from 5 or 10 mbps, maybe a year ago). The result was that this company's towers were oversubscribed... there were times in the evenings when my actual downstream was under 2mbps, at which you can't really watch anything. It took them months to bring up other capacity, move people around, and return me (at least) to a reliably 20+. I now have quite a large movie library on a NAS