The Thrill is Gone

This is the place where you can share your thoughts on selfbondage with like minded people.
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prodrive
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The Thrill is Gone

Post by prodrive »

Hi all, this past weekend I did a self bondage session involving suspension. During the session I became bored and realized that the thrill was gone, not just with this scenario but self bondage in general it just did not excite me like it used to. I am more excited when I have someone else with me performing the bondage and directing me. Has this happened to anyone else? I am afraid my bondage sessions will come to a close because of the lack of a willing partner and my lack of enthusiasm for self lock up. Thanks for any ideas.
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Shannon SteelSlave
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by Shannon SteelSlave »

Have you tried "Munches"? I hear they are a way to meet up with people of your interest.
Bondage is like a foreign film without subtitles. Only through sharing and practice can we hope to understand.
A Jedi uses bondage for knowledge and defense, never for attack.
I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T!....I, I mean S-M-A-R-T!
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prodrive
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by prodrive »

Shannon SteelSlave wrote:Have you tried "Munches"? I hear they are a way to meet up with people of your interest.
It seems they have disappeared around where I am , all links I find lead to nowhere. Thanks tho.
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Shannon SteelSlave
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by Shannon SteelSlave »

I wish I could help. If you're not willing to travel, then just keep reading around here for inspiration. You can still be an asset to this forum as an experienced user. I don't play much these days, it is just a time in my life where work wins out. Not that I don't try..... I just help out here when I can.
Personally, I would love to become uninterested in bondage. Save me from the constant distraction.
Bondage is like a foreign film without subtitles. Only through sharing and practice can we hope to understand.
A Jedi uses bondage for knowledge and defense, never for attack.
I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T!....I, I mean S-M-A-R-T!
👠👠
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kinbaku
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by kinbaku »

prodrive wrote:
Shannon SteelSlave wrote:Have you tried "Munches"? I hear they are a way to meet up with people of your interest.
It seems they have disappeared around where I am , all links I find lead to nowhere. Thanks tho.
Perhaps you can make contact with someone who gives you remote commands that you have to carry out.

For example via Kik: no need to know each other's address, email or telephone number.
Always try to take someone you can trust; for example by contacting the boss of one of the Munches and explaining your problem. Also, don't forward photos that could be used against you or betray your hometown.

Even if the desire for bondage is gone now, it doesn't mean it always is. I've had periods of years where it didn't interest me anymore.
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Blacky
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by Blacky »

...
Even if the desire for bondage is gone now, it doesn't mean it always is. I've had periods of years where it didn't interest me anymore.
Same here. The thrill, and with it the interest, fades from time to time, but up to now it has always returned.
I'd suggest to just give it time.
If the doors of perception were cleansed everything would appear to man as it is, infinite. (W. Blake)
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Gregovic
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by Gregovic »

Interests come and go. It's fine not to feel the urge or enjoy it right now. If you enjoy coming to these forums and reading about the exploits if others then you are still more than welcome here. If you don't enjoy self-bondage right now, just take a break. Don't force it and just let things happen. Maybe it'll come back, maybe it won't. Both are fine.
Munches are probably a bit on the backburner right now in many places because of the whole COVID thing that still isn't fully over. They'll likely start up again in the future. If all else fails from searching on the web you could see if there's a bdsm club in your area (often easier to find than a munch) and then inform there about munches in the area. The people there are probably more aware of the who's-who of the local scene and might just be able to put you in contact with the right people.
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Lotharjulz
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by Lotharjulz »

...
Last edited by Lotharjulz on 30 Jul 2023, 23:08, edited 1 time in total.
Lyn
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by Lyn »

Lotharjulz wrote:
I went through something very similar and it turned out that my hormone levels were low mostly due to a med I was on and partly age. First thing I would check is to go to doctor and get a physical and check your hormone levels.
.
You beat me to it! I was going to say this exact thing. For both men and women, testosterone is important for sexual desire. In women the female hormones play a role too, especially in keeping the vaginal tissues healthy and lubricated which of course also affects desire.

My libido had been steadily declining for years and I finally got tested. My testosterone was zero, not detectable, and my female hormones were very low, so after a lot of research I finally decided to get the bioidentical pellet which is catching on here in the U.S. I understand it has been popular already for a long time in Europe, I was curious if anyone here also uses it?

I say "it" but there are two pellets actually, for a woman. I get a testosterone pellet and an estradiol pellet and they have brought me back to youthful levels of desire. The testosterone is also important for bone density as you age. I had no idea women needed testosterone. We do, just not the high levels men have. Our ovaries naturally produce a little of it in youth along with the estrogens, but they decline with age or with certain medical conditions. A lot of meds will mess with your libido too, or completely kill it, anti-depressants and opioids are two of the most common.
KinkInSpace
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by KinkInSpace »

I went through something like this when I was much younger.

When I was very young, just being bound and helpless was exciting for me and I could basically entertain myself that way, but as I got older that stopped. I could tie myself up, then get bored and just got out.

But BDSM is far more than just bondage. The whole idea of being in bondage is the helplessnesse factor, and you feel more helpless if something keeps occupying your thoughts and reminds you that you are indeed helpless. Pain is a very good way in BDSM to accomplish just that.

You can start small, with nipple clamps but there are a huge range of possibilities.

I used to not be able to take much on my nipples so when I started, I would make strong ties around my genitals to make me feel them as I was being bound, then went to actually inflict pain there by the use of clothespins etc while being bound.

At some point I was able to endure something on my nipples and went to that, and that is basically still what keeps me going. Bondage without pain isn't for me anymore. Bondage in a weird position where I am struggling (like arms in the air, and feel the fatigue on my arms) is something, but not enough. But add pain on my nipples, and then it is fun again.

But as I've grown older still, the act of feeling pain has definitely overgrown my urge to be tied up. With the discovery of estim (electricity play) I can easily just lay down on the bed electrifying my nipples and just keep my hands to the sides and enjoy that a whole lot more than tying myself up with my nipples hurt by clamps.

My conclusion for you would therefor be, it is very likely that the thrill is not gone, but you simply need something stronger, as playing with a partner basically is an upgrade over self-bondage.

Also, a self-bondage session can be done without immobilizing yourself, and that, can actually remove the bored factor too. Have you ever tied yourself into a ropeharness then got dressed and went out? It is actually a form of selfbondage that is extremely interesting and quite fun to do.

See for example:
Image
Formally known as Slave_L.
I'm not yet very comfortable expressing my love for kink from my private life. I will therefor hide behind my username KinkInSpace and not allow any connections to who I really am. I'm sure you'll understand.
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bound_jenny
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by bound_jenny »

Now there's a novel use for nipples... :wink:

:hi:

Jenny.
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kinbaku
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by kinbaku »

KinkInSpace wrote:Also, a self-bondage session can be done without immobilizing yourself, and that, can actually remove the bored factor too. Have you ever tied yourself into a ropeharness then got dressed and went out? It is actually a form of selfbondage that is extremely interesting and quite fun to do.

See for example:
Image
This can also be done by men: with going from below along either side of the scrotum. Then a knot under the perineum and a knot in the place of the anus opening for extra stimulation while walking and sitting down.
Only you don't have such a nice nipple story. :wink:
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Bound Whore
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by Bound Whore »

kinbaku wrote: This can also be done by men: with going from below along either side of the scrotum. Then a knot under the perineum and a knot in the place of the anus opening for extra stimulation while walking and sitting down.
Weird way to spell "for keeping a buttplug tightly in place".
Life's too short to pretend you're not into some kinky shit.
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Lisahs3
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Re: The Thrill is Gone

Post by Lisahs3 »

This is the picture that taught me to tie a rope harness on myself. I still use this its really fun and feels lovely wearing it around my house, makes house work sooo much more interesting.
Yes I do sometimes wear it under my maids dress and other times just the rope. I added a nice little knot to make it more fun

Lisa
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