Why Selfbondage

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Andrea Loves Bondage
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Why Selfbondage

Post by Andrea Loves Bondage »

A question to others:

Why do you do selfbondage?

I know it is a turn on. Certainly is for me. But many schemes fail for one reason or another. There is a danger that you could inextricably entrap yourself, although this may add to the excitement of the exercise. I locked myself to a shelving rack once and almost knocked the escape key on the floor and with my ankles also strapped to the same rack there would have been no way to retrieve the key.

Doing bondage with a partner would provide opportunities for more extreme confinement, but with a reasonably reliable escape mechanism. With a partner, surprise elements could be added, and as long as limits are defined in advance and adhered to this could be quite safe, and fun.

For me I have only done selfbondage and am very leary of trying bondage with someone else because there is a lot of trust required and I’m not sure how to find such a partner. But I’d love to try a few scenarios that may just be too dangerous for selfbondage.

What are other’s thoughts on this?
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Shannon SteelSlave
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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by Shannon SteelSlave »

If you are looking for a partner to help you in bondage, then maybe a munch is in order. Someone else will have to help you with that, though, unfortunately.
I haven't played in a while, since I started living alone, actually. It used to be, that I could bang some part of myself against a wall or a floor to get the attention of someone to rescue me. Never needed that, and my habits remain a mystery to everyone to this day. Not sure I can call that self bondage, even without a willing partner. Being too afraid to do another scenario (or at least not having the time to set one up properly these days) has me thinking of the good old days at times. Doing more dreaming that doing lately. My original reason for joining Bound Anna was to take some advice on "true" self bondage, and maybe run every scenario past someone to screen it for danger.
Talking out loud with others can help add spice to what you already do, and what ever decision you make, whether to continue to go it alone, or find a partner, joining here is a first step toward your discovery.
Bondage is like a foreign film without subtitles. Only through sharing and practice can we hope to understand.
A Jedi uses bondage for knowledge and defense, never for attack.
I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T!....I, I mean S-M-A-R-T!
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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by Riddle »

Why not self-bondage? It is fun, exciting, and a good way to use spare time.

I have done self-bondage for years. Love how easy it is to negotiate a scene to precisely my desires. Any arguments are quickly settled. :rofl:

Partnered bondage is different. Have to consider the other person and what they want.
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Andrea Loves Bondage
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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by Andrea Loves Bondage »

Yes I agree with both replies. I haven’t done any SB for at least 5 years now. Got rid of all my gear because we had our grandson living with us for the last 4 years and he is so nosy that I was worried he’d find it.

Too many of my sessions were unsatisfactory because the release mechanism happened too soon. Also getting that last connection often left me with more mobility than the desired state of immobility, so it wasn’t as satisfactory as it could be.

That’s why I started to think about getting a partner. Looked into some local BDSM groups, including joining chats on their forums. Realistically there might be more people that come to munches than what the chat forums had, but based on who I met in the chat forums I wasn’t too comfortable with meeting them in person.

Also explored the idea of finding a dom but again I want help with my own fantasies, not to become a life long slave, which many doms indicated that they were looking for.
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Shannon SteelSlave
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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by Shannon SteelSlave »

From what I gather, a munch is a safe place to meet people into the BDSM scene. Some can probably be vouched for, but if you decide to meet with someone from there privately, ultimately, you are giving them the trust. Trust to not rob or take advantage. By and large, it is probably the best way to meet. You might even be able to acquire designated people to check in, that is, call or drop by, your appointments with your newfound "friend", to check that everything is ok, and that you can give a BDSM sign that things that may look deceiving to a vanilla, are going well, like the "traffic light system". You could get lucky, and these designated checkers may even join in, if they get a sign that it is ok with.
These are just observations on my part. I have never been to a munch.
Bondage is like a foreign film without subtitles. Only through sharing and practice can we hope to understand.
A Jedi uses bondage for knowledge and defense, never for attack.
I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T!....I, I mean S-M-A-R-T!
👠👠
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bound_jenny
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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by bound_jenny »

Why? Because it's naughty and it's fun.

But seriously...

It's - counter-intuitively - a release. Being restrained physically allows me to release pent-up frustrations accumulated during the day, like a crappy day at the office, or a monster traffic jam caused by a single flake of snow, etc. There's also a way to release some sexual energy there, because, as mentioned, it's a turn-on. I do my 30-45 minutes of struggling and writhing and let myself loose. Then I'm relaxed, satisfied. Sometimes even hornier than ever... :rofl:

It's an escape - again counter-intuitively. I let my mind drift to another universe, another reality, where I am the damsel in distress, not on my livingroom floor but somewhere else, in an abandoned warehouse, a dark basement, wherever my imagination takes me. That's also a part of the release of tensions, just being someone else, somewhere else, if only for a half hour.

It's all very therapeutic (again that word "counter-intuitively", because some people would call whole bit a tad crazy... :lol: ).

It's also some very good exercise. Burns calories like nobody's business.

All that while wearing - you guessed it - a corset. Nice and tight.

That "inescapable" thing doesn't do anything for me. In fact, that back-of-the-mind worry about not being able to escape distracts me from the first and foremost goal of my self-bondage sessions: to relax. My wrist coil is just loose enough to be able to work my hands free with some effort, while remaining secure as I struggle. No preoccupations. But there is a knife just a roll-over or two away just in case. My mind is at ease and I can put all my effort into the sensuality and and psychological aspects of my session.

Jenny.
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Andrea Loves Bondage
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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by Andrea Loves Bondage »

The helplessness of inescapability is what gives me the turn on. But any selfbondage needs a safe release/escape method. That’s what is leading me to consider trying to find a bondage partner.

A few years back I found the ideal solution. It was a BDSM space with some equipment (cross, stocks, etc.) that you could rent for 3 hours minimum. I did rent it once, but didn’t have the necessary gear to lock myself into total immobility. As a selfbondage user they would check on me periodically and at the end of 3 hours would have come in to get me to clean up and leave. If I was in an inescapable session, with a key prominently provided they would have released me. Unfortunately they shutdown the space shortly after (liability concerns), and also relocated their store, a great BDSM supply place, to a new space but never seemed to open, although they still have a website where you can order stuff.
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Onixpected
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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by Onixpected »

bound_jenny wrote:Why? Because it's naughty and it's fun.

But seriously...

It's - counter-intuitively - a release. Being restrained physically allows me to release pent-up frustrations accumulated during the day, like a crappy day at the office, or a monster traffic jam caused by a single flake of snow, etc. There's also a way to release some sexual energy there, because, as mentioned, it's a turn-on. I do my 30-45 minutes of struggling and writhing and let myself loose. Then I'm relaxed, satisfied. Sometimes even hornier than ever... :rofl:

It's an escape - again counter-intuitively. I let my mind drift to another universe, another reality, where I am the damsel in distress, not on my livingroom floor but somewhere else, in an abandoned warehouse, a dark basement, wherever my imagination takes me. That's also a part of the release of tensions, just being someone else, somewhere else, if only for a half hour.

It's all very therapeutic (again that word "counter-intuitively", because some people would call whole bit a tad crazy... :lol: ).

It's also some very good exercise. Burns calories like nobody's business.

All that while wearing - you guessed it - a corset. Nice and tight.

That "inescapable" thing doesn't do anything for me. In fact, that back-of-the-mind worry about not being able to escape distracts me from the first and foremost goal of my self-bondage sessions: to relax. My wrist coil is just loose enough to be able to work my hands free with some effort, while remaining secure as I struggle. No preoccupations. But there is a knife just a roll-over or two away just in case. My mind is at ease and I can put all my effort into the sensuality and and psychological aspects of my session.

Jenny.
I feel the same about inescapability :O It doesn't need to be inescapable to be fun and accomplish what I need, the amazing time and the turn-on. My first goal in bondage is also to relax and distract from trivial irl stuff and my fav position is spreadeagle. I experiment a lot the Frustrated Eagle version I found in this site a few years ago. Instead of a combination lock, I use some kind of metal ring that opens and closes, in case I need to leave for any reason. I'm hoping to when I start to leave alone I can spend a night like that and use the daylight release...fun fun fun :twisted:

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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by tiedandgone »

As the years have gone by, the reasons for my doing selfbondage have modified rather than changed. In very young days, it was hard to see beyond the immediate feelings of desire and excitement at being somehow tied up. Thankfully those feelings are still there, but so too are deeper insights that have progressively helped me to feel less "odd" and more at peace with it. I too, find being bound to be deeply relaxing; I've never been a "struggler", but rather prefer to drift away, letting every muscle relax into the rope. Indeed it is a paradox, that the restraints lead to a profound sense of freedom and release from the tensions of daily life. I have also come to appreciate the physical benefits of what in some ways I see as a kind of extreme sport. I am convinced that various taxing positions keep me supple, and absolutely, the application of the bondage is very often a significant cardio workout.

With regard to the inescapable issue, I think that there is always a trade-off here, either in solo or partnered bondage. Alone I need a reasonably immediate release for either emergencies or when I just want out (Safe and Sane). In partnered bondage, a safe word/signal will bring about escape from even the most stringent of ties and/or "abandonment" scenes (Safe, Sane and Consensual). For me, the sensuality of my bondage is not at all compromised by knowing that I can get out of it reasonably quickly....more than a few three-plus hours hogties are testament to that! :rofl:
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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by cerenaselfbound »

SB is the only way for me, I've had a couple of bi relationships in the past, I introduced bondage but it just didn't hit that high as I hoped it would. I probably had the wrong partner as I had to suggest ideas & show them how to tie me which really isn't the point when you're a sub as I am. Since my teens I've been happy with SB & never wanted anyone to share bondage with. I've explored many fantasies over the years & still do, tying myself different ways both inside & outside. One short relationship I had with a man had to end because he didn't like me wearing a butt plug & vibrator to please myself. Maybe he felt threatened, I wasn't going to stop what I liked doing to please someone else so he got the elbow. It's all down to personal preferences, I'm a sub who likes SB, it satisfies my huge hunger to be tied up & gagged where I'm able to cum numerous times in a session. I can be tied up anyway I wish & to anything, usually my double bed. I can get dressed in what I like & walk around with a rope body harness, butt plugged & dildo'd to my hearts content & don't have to consider anyone else. That's the best thing about living on your own, you can please yourself. So it's SB for me, always has been & always will be.
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Re: Why Selfbondage

Post by Stephanie85 »

For me I just love the way it feels, I am a sub and a Dom at the same time.
It’s just my alone time and I have a lot of fun with it, It helps take stress away and I love the way it feels.
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