Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

"Normal bondage" with a partner. Post here if your post do not fit the selfbondage threads.
Post Reply
TdAdvtrs
***
Posts: 219
Joined: 29 Sep 2012, 02:11

Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by TdAdvtrs »

Had a short term hook up with a lady into it and was tied spread to the bed.

Had a LTR quite a few years back now, we were always were using the chains and suitcase locks arguing over whos turn it was to be tied. We both liked being the captured one better.

This latest hookup was fun as it was been long time but as I am stuck there I am thinking wait a minute this is a little different then my fantasy imagination had been telling me.

Was only tied with the bed sheet torn into strips but I was stuck. Pulling and testing it. I was stuck.

Anyway, the topic. I find my imagination about being bound much different then the real thing. Hard to explain.
"Tied Adventures" that was the idea behind this screen name.
User avatar
bound_jenny
Moderator
Posts: 10268
Joined: 09 Dec 2007, 12:37
Location: Montreal, Canada, Great Kinky North

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by bound_jenny »

In one's imagination, one can explore territory that would be otherwise dangerous or too scary.

My best experiences include both physical "reality" bondage and a liberal dose of imagination. It's hard to tell which is influencing which, so I figure that both real sensations and imagination combine to make an enhanced experience. I lose myself, for some fleeting minutes, in that alternate reality, and that's what makes the whole thing a very cathartic, therapeutic experience. I feel much more centered, serene, after such a session.

I'd say that separating imagination and reality is avoiding the best part of bondage, self-applied or partnered. Once bound, it's much more intense to combine the two. Yes, one is different from the other. Like ingredients in a cookie recipe, once mixed up and baked, the enjoyment is amplified. 8)

Way better than eating flour. :rofl:

Jenny.
Helplessness is a doorway to the innermost reaches of the soul.
If my corset isn't tight, it just isn't right!
Kink is the spice of life!
Come to the Dark Side - we have cookies!
User avatar
Lisahs3
****
Posts: 606
Joined: 21 Jun 2021, 00:42

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by Lisahs3 »

Jenny thats so well put. Not just for bondage but any kind of fantasy play should be a mixture of reality and imagination.
I think thats why I love selfbondage so much is because I can let my mind wonder where ever I want too and that feeling of being restrained while wearing something sexy of flirty really lets me experience so much more.
Real bondage play I have done with someone tying me up or even me tying them up, its rare but I have done that. It has never been as intense and exciting because I think we all have those thoughts and ideas of what it will be like and so often reality doesn't live up to those thoughts.
There is so much I want and need from a scene to make it all work for me. Intense, exciting, romantic and that feeling of total indulgence.

Lisa
User avatar
JIMDINI
****
Posts: 1539
Joined: 28 Oct 2007, 09:54
Location: UK

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by JIMDINI »

bound_jenny wrote:I'd say that separating imagination and reality is avoiding the best part of bondage, self-applied or partnered. Once bound, it's much more intense to combine the two. Yes, one is different from the other. Like ingredients in a cookie recipe, once mixed up and baked, the enjoyment is amplified.
bound_jenny wrote:My best experiences include both physical "reality" bondage and a liberal dose of imagination. It's hard to tell which is influencing which, so I figure that both real sensations and imagination combine to make an enhanced experience. I lose myself, for some fleeting minutes, in that alternate reality, and that's what makes the whole thing a very cathartic, therapeutic experience. I feel much more centered, serene, after such a session
Lisa &Jenny I totally agree.
And we all know you have cookies on the dark side :rofl:
Never confuse your ambitions with your abilities. If you can't free yourself, who will?
When your helpless, you have no choice but to wait.
KinkInSpace
*****
Posts: 2141
Joined: 24 Dec 2015, 16:11
Location: Netherlands

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by KinkInSpace »

I think the biggest problem here is what you want and what you can tolerate vs what your partner thinks you want and thinks you can tolerate.

It really starts with that it is hard to put into words what it is you want. I mean, if I look for porn videos on a topic I want, I find it hard to get a video that shows what I want to see because it is hard to search for it. I have to think long and hard to get the proper terms and then I sometimes find those movies.

The same is in communicating to a partner. When love is involved, it will be really hard for a partner to find your boundaries and cross them or walk that fine line.

Because the most exhilarating thing in bondage is to be surprised, it often is not discussed on what is going to happen, which makes it so much harder for the partner to get it just right.

That said, if you want the true experience to be as close as possible to what you imagined, you will have to hire a trained proffessional.

Then there is another thing. In fantasy, things may appeal greatly, but when it actually happens to you in real life, it may not be what you thought it would be. For example, you may be very drawn to corporal punishment. Being hit with a cane hard enough to leave marks and then the aftermath of not being able to sit down, so it is something you really want. You then hire a Domme who will be able to deliver exactly that, and after the first hit lands, you find it to be so much more painful than you thought it would be that the session ends before you actually get the result you wanted.

So my advise is, do not compare fantasy and real life. Gauge the real life experience and see how you can make them better. At some point they will surpass your fantasies.
Formally known as Slave_L.
I'm not yet very comfortable expressing my love for kink from my private life. I will therefor hide behind my username KinkInSpace and not allow any connections to who I really am. I'm sure you'll understand.
Lotharjulz
***
Posts: 278
Joined: 10 Apr 2021, 05:30

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by Lotharjulz »

...
Last edited by Lotharjulz on 30 Jul 2023, 23:20, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
AllieXBow
**
Posts: 122
Joined: 13 Sep 2021, 07:42
Location: NZ / (She/They)

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by AllieXBow »

Not much to say here but -

Being tied up HURTS! Damn...

I liked to see the really tight looking stuff on boundhub etc, and in pictures, I think it looks super hot and sexy but when you try it it's wow really different, compared you comfortably watching the video in bed or on the couch...

Still fun...
Restrict one of your senses, you heighten the others. Close your eyes, you can hear better. What if you're unable to move, speak, nor see, yet only able to feel the pressure of the ropes tightly yet blissfully binding your body, how free must the mind be?
User avatar
Shannon SteelSlave
Moderator
Posts: 6531
Joined: 03 Feb 2019, 19:49
Location: New England, USA

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by Shannon SteelSlave »

AllieXBow wrote: I liked to see the really tight looking stuff on boundhub etc, and in pictures, I think it looks super hot and sexy but when you try it it's wow really different, compared you comfortably watching the video in bed or on the couch...
I really wish I could develop a fetish for couch potatoes. Not really my style, so it's going to have to remain tight and tied for the time being in general.
Bondage is like a foreign film without subtitles. Only through sharing and practice can we hope to understand.
A Jedi uses bondage for knowledge and defense, never for attack.
I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T!....I, I mean S-M-A-R-T!
👠👠
User avatar
BoundInKasugai
***
Posts: 352
Joined: 19 Feb 2011, 06:28

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by BoundInKasugai »

AllieXBow wrote:Not much to say here but -
I liked to see the really tight looking stuff on boundhub etc, and in pictures, I think it looks super hot and sexy but when you try it it's wow really different, compared you comfortably watching the video in bed or on the couch...
On twitter I saw some of your "work" on your trip to Europe. From my couch I must say it looks super tight, hot and sexy! :rofl: And seriously impressive!
User avatar
bound_jenny
Moderator
Posts: 10268
Joined: 09 Dec 2007, 12:37
Location: Montreal, Canada, Great Kinky North

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by bound_jenny »

BoundInKasugai wrote:And seriously impressive!
Amen to that! :love:

Jenny.
Helplessness is a doorway to the innermost reaches of the soul.
If my corset isn't tight, it just isn't right!
Kink is the spice of life!
Come to the Dark Side - we have cookies!
User avatar
Lisahs3
****
Posts: 606
Joined: 21 Jun 2021, 00:42

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by Lisahs3 »

I agree every time I see your pictures I am amazed how you manage to do some of them on your own.
Yes it’s true really strict and tight bondage can be uncomfortable. I really like something that is restrictive but comfortable but I know I can thrash about and struggle as much as I like. At least that’s what most of my fantasies are…

Lisa
User avatar
kinbaku
*****
Posts: 5052
Joined: 10 Jan 2020, 20:26
Location: Belgium

Re: Being bound, imagination vs real the real thing

Post by kinbaku »

I don't have a twitter, but knowing AlieXBow I can picture it vividly. :)
Post Reply