Jadit wrote:Did you have a talk with the dommes first on what you really want?
Exactly what I was going to say.
First, separate Dommes from ProDOmmes.
A ProDomme - a "life-styler", rather than a prostitute cashing in on kink, will be more likely to provide what you want, and if she has the equipment, do what you want. I don't have paying experience with ProDommes, but I know several. Most will have their own preferences and you would need to explore your mutual interests before arranging a session. Some will simply not do what you may want - for example a good friend is very skilled with a cane, but refuses to wear kink-orientated clothing, she is therefore ideal if you enjoy a good caning, but no good at all if you want the "black leather and heels" Dominatrix. With a ProDomme, you are paying for her time, so to some extent, you call the shots.
A Domme, on the other hand, will only do what she wants, money doesn't come into it at all, so you need to find one who is happy to help you achieve your fantasy - in which case you will need to get yourself known on the local "scene". I can think of several who are more than capable of providing the OP's "scene" - including my friend (she was a ProDomme for 15 years) but I stress, it has to be something she wants to do, and she has to get something out of it (except money or gifts) and that usually means at least some kind of relationship.
As to the gay sites, bear in mind that websites are not real-life ! There may be a bias towards the severe bondage for men, there is an inbuilt macho feeling that only really serious bondage will hold us down, and perhaps an enjoyment in bondage that we test our strength against - and of course the fantasy that we are being forced to orgasm against our will.
I don't think you have to be gay to enjoy male-male bondage - well, I did (and I'm straight), with a friend and his male-to-female trans partner, the play was not directly sexual, but an opportunity to try a range of bondage and pain/impact/electro play. All I can say is that if you are hooded, blindfolded, in a tight leather sleep-sack I doubt you'd be much bothered who was doing what! (in my case connected up to an advanced electro-play set running a programme called "orgasm"
) Another friend is "bi-sexual", I've no doubt I could have a scene with him, but wouldn't want a sexual side to the play, but would be happy to do some bondage.
If an orgasm is the intended climax (pun intended!) then this does present a problem unless the OP can separate his own sexuality from enjoying the bondage and stimulation. This would be much easier if he concentrates on making friends with similar interests on a face-to-face basis.
There is a lot of information about that on the net, especially if you look at gay sites. You can find exactly what I am looking for, guys tied down by all means and then milked by any device that you can imagine. Now, the big question is, why can only men fullfill these dreams of bondage? No professional domme could even get close to that. I was very close sometimes to get in touch with some guy, but I couldn't do it, I just love only women.
Maybe some day I will be so horny that I'll just do it...
