Wondering about the psycology behind

[jollywankee]

Hi!

i got interested in BDSM for 5-6 years ago, bought a lot of chains, padlocks and chains, again and again, due to shame over myself i trow away stuff, then to by new stuff after a while.

Anyone with a theory why one becomes interested in BDSM? Troublesome childhood? Undergoing a study by psychologist, he is going to determin if I suffer from PTSD, have not mentioned my interests in selfbondage.

Anyways, I like to do selfbondage on bathroom, nude, also some sessions on webcam, really getting it interesting with the cam.
Now it is a while since last camsession, and I forgot the siteadress, any tips of where to broadcast for free?

[bound_jenny]

Hi, JW,

I moved your topic here, where you'll definitely get more viewers and responses to questions like yours.

I was interested in bondage of one form or another since childhood. Some of my earliest memories are about hiding in the closet and tying myself up using belts and whatever was available in your average family closet. A career pervert, one could say!

Was my childhood troublesome? I don't think so, not more so than any other child. I was just curious, probably. Curious to see how all those people on TV and in comics felt when they were tied up (indirectly, why I felt what I felt when I saw them tied up ). And it seems that I really liked what I felt!

Later in life, I found out that what I wanted to experience was called BDSM. My first visit to a sex shop was a revelation. My inhibitions eventually lifted, and I looked for ways to find others of like mind (now that I knew that what I did and felt was NOT some aberration or illness). Remember that this was way, way before the Internet (dating myself here... ). Needless to say, the Internet took my "hobby" to new heights.

Personally, I never threw away bondage stuff (unless they were totally knackered and rendered useless). What you do periodically may be interpreted as the equivalent of a cross-dresser "purging" (not that I'm saying that you're a cross-dresser, but comparing your actions to those of one).

I don't think that your PTSD has anything to do with your interest in bondage. There are plenty of people here who enjoy SB without that. I'd say treat the PTSD issue separately - taking care of that might even help you enjoy self-bondage better. But then, I'm no psychologist (I just play one on the Internet ).

jm2c,

Jenny.

[JIMDINI]

I too started at an early age and found I enjoyed being tied up.(also before the internet!)

A career pervert, one could say!

Aren't we all


Like any hobby/interest the levels of activity vary and sometimes we have a clear out ( although as with Jenny when it comes to Bondage equipment it is usually only thrown out if it is knackered or if I think it is to dangerous to use.)

As to webcam of sessions I would direct you to Jennys' warning, link here http://forum.boundanna.net/board/viewto ... f=4&t=8662

[tiemeupalso]

first things first,dont let a psycologist,psychiatrists (ok i cant spell) get into your head.it is fake science.
i have loved to be tied up since a child.at lease before i was 10.
i think it is something most people have thought about at one time or another whether they want to admit it or not.
just enjoy it.

[KinkInSpace]

Being kinky is a matter of taste.

Like some people enjoy the taste of chocolate, and others don't, some people enjoy anything kinky while others don't.

Keep in mind that bdsm and kink are very broad things. While most people are likely in for one form of kink, only a handful of those are in favor of the same type of kink.

As with taste, one can develop an interest for taste, but it can also be that no matter what, you simply don't like it.

You should compare BDSM feelings to that of food. When you taste something that you really like, it does the same to you as when you experience something BDSM related that you really like.

[Sir Cumference]

If you have good reason to believe that you have PTSD*, you need professional help.

*But the "T" is for "traumatic", and if you have not been the victim of violence, abuse or the like (or have other psychiatric conditions), you should be very careful about letting a psychologist "see if you have PTSD".
Depending on where you live in the world, the "therapist" could have a clear interest in making you a client.
Judging from your spelling, you could be Norwegian. They have a pretty reasonable health care system, and I'm not as cautious as if you had been American.

But implanted memories are unfortunately a very real problem.



The alternative is, that you are just a pervert by nature. Live with it.

The realisation in psychology these days is, that the "perversions" formerly considered to be "mental problems" are just the way we are born, and as long as you do not hurt other people (in an un-consenting way ) it is not a problem.
But even in the Western world, there are still people suffering from religion and the like, who are not willing to accept that.

[Gregovic]

first things first,dont let a psycologist,psychiatrists (ok i cant spell) get into your head.it is fake science.

I wouldn't go so far as calling it fake science. There certainly are those out there following scientific methods and doing actual proper research. They are unfortunately (depending on location/country/healthcare system) few and far between. A good psychologist or psychiatrist can certainly help you to deal with a lot of mental health issues, but you always have to keep in mind they are keen on sticking a label on you. My bondage and cross-dressing is certainly not something I would discuss with one.

[bound_jenny]

a psycologist,psychiatrists (ok i cant spell)

You got the second one right - that's usually the hardest one. You missed the "h" in the first one.

As for fake science, it's not technically erroneous, it's somewhat fuzzy (psychology) because each person is fundamentally different, though the mechanisms the mind uses to protect itself are generally similar. Psychologists go into the less tangible area of behavior, thinking, reasoning and cognitive functions (software) - they try to have you figure out for yourself what's going on. Psychiatrists, on the other hand, can address the underlying physical and/or neurochemical problems that cause many mental illnesses (hardware), and can help with psychology too. A step further inside the hardware are the neurologists and neurosurgeons - they actually go in and mess about inside the skull and fix things (tumors, cysts, etc.). Maybe even solder a few wires here and there. The brain is one heck of a complex piece of hardware and runs software that puts any operating system to shame. Unless a zombie hamster gets in there are starts wreaking havoc. Then you'd better have a neurosurgeon with a zombie extraction kit.

Jenny.

[ponylady]

i have a similiar "timeline, biography, experience, whatever you wanna call it" as jenny, also way back when the arpanet was the hype of the IT-age.

you learn to accept your kink as part of your personality & enjoy it. being different makes you a stronger person. (sideeffect, if you are kind of open about it, also a more sexually attractive person)

[Sir Cumference]

Definitions may vary around the world, but where I live it is a such:

Psychiatrist: An extra layer of education on top of a medical doctor. They should adhere to the scientific method and rational therapy. They are allowed to prescribe medicine.

Psychologist: A formal university training leading to "cand.psych". A protected title. They have to follow certain guidelines regarding ethics and treatment to maintain their authorisation.


"Therapist" is not a protected title, and anybody can call themself that.

Neither is "Psychoanalysist". They have an association and authorize their own members.... But "psychoanalysis" has all the hallmarks of a pseudoscience.

[Old Timer]

I've never really thought about the psychology of self bondage. I too started out at a young age, and kept at it, for me it might be hereditary I don't know. I do know I've always enjoyed it and it is a form of stress relief and pretty good form of exercise. Over the years I've made several items for SB and tossed them out its the same with ropes and other gear that I aquire, I get so much stuff I need to get rid of some of the older stuff except for favorite items of course. This is like a form of meditation, its something you do for yourself. There is no need to overthink it or create negative feedback within yourself for doing it. The exception would be if you are causing yourself injuries from doing it, that would be not good.

[jollywankee]

Thnx for good replies

I have now had 2 good sessions in peace of mind

Keys in the freezer now, soon ready for nexr!

[TdAdvtrs]

Anyone with a theory why one becomes interested in BDSM?

I have no idea, I just saw that scene of the woman chained in the original movie clash of the titans and it started it. This was before the internet and I thought it was very very unusual and kept it to myself, then with my first real girlfriend I suggested we play tie up for fun but even then I kind of kept it to myself how much fun I thought it was. I bet you cant tie me in a way I cant get out... Hoping to loose. Then of course suggesting mixing tie up with sex.

[BornThisWay]

I suspect that at least half if not most people are aroused by bondage in one way or another.
Just as I believe most people have homosexual tendencies.
I think when it comes to bondage, (or homosexuality) it's not a hard yes or no, but rather a spectrum of varying degrees.
I'm drawing a comparison between homosexuality and bondage because I agree with other posters that this is the way some people are born.
I hope I'm not wrong in saying that it is now generally accepted that (some?/most?/all?) homosexuals were born as homosexuals and not made that way due to some life event. And I believe that people in this lifestyle are no different.
As long as, like another poster said, you are not doing something to someone else against their consent, there is no problem.
And I use consent in the broadest sense of the word.

[leopard99]

A few observations.

Lots of kids play tying up games. Whether it's cowboys and indians, damsels in distress etc etc. For some of us it must make an enduring impression and that's why we're here. For men at least there's also a definite physical link between restraint and sex. For men, muscle tension is well known as enhancing sexual pleasure. From there it's a very short step to struggling against rope, chains, cuffs etc. At the opposite extreme bondage can be a form of relaxation therapy. I've not done yoga or other meditation but talking to those who do, the relaxation aspects of bondage sound as if they are doing similar things.

I can't find the reference at the moment but in at least one culture a woman is expected to struggle on her wedding night so the custom is to bind her so she can struggle even more. Might have been in Joy of Sex.

Although it's now regarded as cruel, the swaddling of babies was commonplace in the past.

So a tendency to some kind of bondage may be genetically "hard wired" or strongly programmed by culture.

In other words we're normal, it's all the others who are deviant and repressed