So this girl I'm really into and I were talking and for some reason we started talking about bondage. We realized we were both into it and she is coming over in a few days so we can tie each other up for a little bit. I've only ever done selfbondage and I think she is a complete bondage virgin. Are there any ties anybody can recommend that I can do on her that aren't the basic spread eagle or hogtied (she wants some excitement)? I have a decent amount of rope and was also wondering if there was anything I can easily get from around the house.
Thanks
First time bondage help
Re: First time bondage help
You need to qualify "she wants some excitement"
start off with a fundamental requirement - a safe-word. Choose something that isn't likely to come up in your interactions, "no" and "stop" are no good as safewords, though at this stage you should take them at face value anyway. Then discuss limits - will you allow intimate touching, is sex wanted, that sort of thing. Then discuss any other limitations - being scared of a particular situation, having limited mobility in a joint, having high blood pressure, liklihood for fainting (I had to treat a guy who fainted during a scene - he said after coming round "I often do that" but had failed to mention it to his Top, who was panic-stricken by the sudden collapse!)
Once you've covered that lot, on to the tying up!
I like doing the predicament bondage scenes as they are usually good fun for both parties. Have a look at the scenarios on the main forum, self-bondage scenes have to be "interesting" in themselves as there is no external interaction. But that doesn't mean you can't use them in partnered play.
So for example, make a door-hanger from some cord and a block of wood, piece of plastic pipe etc anything that will be retained behind the top of a closed door, with a loop coming into the room you are in ( a simple way of getting an over-the-head anchor point) Then tie the wrists and link to the hanger, with some slack in the loop, ie not straining the wrists upwards. Then tie the ankles apart and to a piece of wood, a simple spreader bar would be good. Now a crotch rope made by tying a tight loop around the waist, feeding a long "end" down the front and back up between the bum cheeks, and back down to the spreader bar centre. Pull that tight so the knees are slightly bent.
In this position the person wants to straighten their legs, but that tightens the crotch rope, which is uncomfortable, so they bend the legs and so repeat the cycle. If the person is into pain, apply nipple clamps and stretch them upwards to the overhead anchor. Now you have a double predicament!
All of that works for both sexes (guess how I know...
)
You can set up much the same with variations of the hog-tie.
a final precaution, if using rope, make sure you have, preferably, a strong pair of scissors as an emergency release. The type used in A&E (ED for the Yanks!) are very good, as they have blunt tips, serrated blades that grip the rope and are very sharp, as well as being very cheap - I bought mine for approx £2) Safer than a knife.
start off with a fundamental requirement - a safe-word. Choose something that isn't likely to come up in your interactions, "no" and "stop" are no good as safewords, though at this stage you should take them at face value anyway. Then discuss limits - will you allow intimate touching, is sex wanted, that sort of thing. Then discuss any other limitations - being scared of a particular situation, having limited mobility in a joint, having high blood pressure, liklihood for fainting (I had to treat a guy who fainted during a scene - he said after coming round "I often do that" but had failed to mention it to his Top, who was panic-stricken by the sudden collapse!)
Once you've covered that lot, on to the tying up!
I like doing the predicament bondage scenes as they are usually good fun for both parties. Have a look at the scenarios on the main forum, self-bondage scenes have to be "interesting" in themselves as there is no external interaction. But that doesn't mean you can't use them in partnered play.
So for example, make a door-hanger from some cord and a block of wood, piece of plastic pipe etc anything that will be retained behind the top of a closed door, with a loop coming into the room you are in ( a simple way of getting an over-the-head anchor point) Then tie the wrists and link to the hanger, with some slack in the loop, ie not straining the wrists upwards. Then tie the ankles apart and to a piece of wood, a simple spreader bar would be good. Now a crotch rope made by tying a tight loop around the waist, feeding a long "end" down the front and back up between the bum cheeks, and back down to the spreader bar centre. Pull that tight so the knees are slightly bent.
In this position the person wants to straighten their legs, but that tightens the crotch rope, which is uncomfortable, so they bend the legs and so repeat the cycle. If the person is into pain, apply nipple clamps and stretch them upwards to the overhead anchor. Now you have a double predicament!
All of that works for both sexes (guess how I know...
)You can set up much the same with variations of the hog-tie.
a final precaution, if using rope, make sure you have, preferably, a strong pair of scissors as an emergency release. The type used in A&E (ED for the Yanks!) are very good, as they have blunt tips, serrated blades that grip the rope and are very sharp, as well as being very cheap - I bought mine for approx £2) Safer than a knife.
be a switch, double the fun 
Re: First time bondage help
lj already laid out good & sound advice.
you should heed all of it.
make sure you 2 have a relaxed atmosphere; and if she really is a "bondage virgin" even just wrists tied tightly behind her back, kneeling in front of you might overwhelm her.
go slowly, good luck & have fun.
you should heed all of it.
make sure you 2 have a relaxed atmosphere; and if she really is a "bondage virgin" even just wrists tied tightly behind her back, kneeling in front of you might overwhelm her.
go slowly, good luck & have fun.
[
Re: First time bondage help
lj had great advice, I definitely echo the point of getting emergency shears. If you are doing any sort of play with rope you should have them nearby - not just in case of emergencies but for a feeling of safety as well. Make sure you explain that they are there should you need it.
Check in a lot with each other while you are playing. You are both new so don't get carried away - just some simple and straightforward ties to begin with. Check blood flow to extremities regularly.
Don't get carried away with the excitement - it's very easy to get excitable at the prospect of doing something you've wanted for years, but don't rush into the deep end on your first play session. Avoid gags, blindfolds and other sensory restricting equipment for the first time and just see how the energy and flow works between you. Bondage requires a lot of trust, so you want to create a safe environment early on where you can both feel at ease. As Ponylady said, for a first timer there are lots of things which are very hot in your imagination - but in actual practice can be completely terrifying, and cause a very messy end to a scene. Take it slow! If you both enjoy it you will have plenty of opportunities to up the ante on subsequent play times.
Don't be afraid to use yellow/orange to signal when you are not feeling good, or your limits are being approached. This helps the person who is doing the topping judge what does/doesn't work, and also adjust the pacing of the scene accordingly.
Most importantly - have fun, relax, and stay safe, sane and consentual
Check in a lot with each other while you are playing. You are both new so don't get carried away - just some simple and straightforward ties to begin with. Check blood flow to extremities regularly.
Don't get carried away with the excitement - it's very easy to get excitable at the prospect of doing something you've wanted for years, but don't rush into the deep end on your first play session. Avoid gags, blindfolds and other sensory restricting equipment for the first time and just see how the energy and flow works between you. Bondage requires a lot of trust, so you want to create a safe environment early on where you can both feel at ease. As Ponylady said, for a first timer there are lots of things which are very hot in your imagination - but in actual practice can be completely terrifying, and cause a very messy end to a scene. Take it slow! If you both enjoy it you will have plenty of opportunities to up the ante on subsequent play times.
Don't be afraid to use yellow/orange to signal when you are not feeling good, or your limits are being approached. This helps the person who is doing the topping judge what does/doesn't work, and also adjust the pacing of the scene accordingly.
Most importantly - have fun, relax, and stay safe, sane and consentual
Re: First time bondage help
Damn Lj has come with a great scenario! 
but i was thinking it could be to much for a first time...
You should start easily and step by step. Try to do 3 sessions that day (wich is pretty much!) if you can or maybe spread it in a week. The first one should just be the introduction. On bed, tying her hands above here head to the bedpost, blindfolded and legs spread appart again to the side posts. Then you have a basic view of what she wants and maybe what she doesn't.
The second session, you can go a bit further, like a hogtie (not to tight). And as a last session, you can do what Lj said but starting with that might scare here... But you have to find out yourself But if she is really a bondage virgin, i would watch out doing the moderate stuff from the first time
Good luck!
S.
but i was thinking it could be to much for a first time...You should start easily and step by step. Try to do 3 sessions that day (wich is pretty much!) if you can or maybe spread it in a week. The first one should just be the introduction. On bed, tying her hands above here head to the bedpost, blindfolded and legs spread appart again to the side posts. Then you have a basic view of what she wants and maybe what she doesn't.
The second session, you can go a bit further, like a hogtie (not to tight). And as a last session, you can do what Lj said
but starting with that might scare here... But you have to find out yourself But if she is really a bondage virgin, i would watch out doing the moderate stuff from the first time Good luck!
S.
