Types of cross-dressers?

Crossdressing as a part of or type of selfbondage.
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bounddosster
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by bounddosster »

Natasha I commend you on your efforts. I could stand to lose a few pounds, ok several pounds. I don't think I'm overweight. I did ask my wife but she is fatter than me so she says "oh, your fine" In the hope that she too can ignore the bleeding obvious. I'd love an objective opinion as to my weight, it might serve to motivate me more. But in my upon opinion, well ok I'm fat-ish. My belly doesn't sag although it does stick out a bit. I've been trying to lose weight ever since a nurse practically ordered me to do so during my last asthma check. I must admit to becoming a little aroused when she had me standing on the scales and she said "next time I see you I want to see these scales reading less", she said it in pure vanilla terms, I think, but it was just one of those everyday comments that those of us blessed with kinky minds read differently to the vanilla mind.

Did I loose any weight?, a little I think, but as usual with my lazy lack of self will it soon got forgotten. I currently weigh 15st 5lbs (215lbs) 5'11" and according to the nhs experts I should be no more than 12st 7lbs (175lbs) so thats 40lbs over. :( . Perhaps it is time to get my arse kicked and get on with it before I have to see the nurse again not that I can remember when that is.

I do see Natasha's point about wanting to be slimmer as a female. Not that I'd consider myself a cross-dresser. I have dabbled in the past purely as a sexual thing and when my partner was more dominant she did push it more. She had me wearing female undies daily and was working with stockings and more erotic underwear and of course there was the maids uniform. If I was to cross-dress I think she would easily except it maybe even prefer it but things didn't get that far.

When cross-dressed I always had so many feelings that was hard to really understand. In natural mode I'm cursed with being pretty hairy, I hate it and do as I have recently remove all my body hair but then of course it grows back and my lazy will power soon falls me and allows the hair to return. When I did cross-dress and had body hair I felt ridiculous.

But when I cross dressed with a smooth body I somehow felt sexy but also embarrassed and humiliated. So was I felling sexy because of the cross-dressing or because of the embarrassment and humiliation both which can be a turn on.

I'd love to free myself of my inhibitions and explore cross-dressing more, although I find it more appealing if there is some element of being forced to do it, it is almost like it gives me an excuses as to why I'm doing it.

I did once go out fully cross-dressed for a drive and took a walk around the car in a quiet spot then suddenly before I knew it there was a car wanting to park where I was so they had slowed right down and I had to get in the car under their full view dressed in a short skirt, stockings, heels and a top but I ha no wig on so it was totally oblivious I was male. That left me with very strange feelings .
That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

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I'm in the same boat as you Doster, very similar height and just a bit lighter (now, I used to be heavier). For me too, crossdressing is a motivation to get some weight off.

I am not really confident determining what kind of cross dresser I am. I don't think I would actually want to live as a woman, For now I just do what feels comfortable to me, which is just dressing up in the comfort of my own home. I do sometimes wish I had the confidence to just go out to get the bins or something, but even that is a step too far for me right now. I don't think my immediate neighbours have a problem with it, but living in the middle of a city in the Netherlands means there's a LOT more people around who could have a very different (and nasty) response to it.

Still haven't even found the confidence to talk about it with my therapist/psychiatrist..
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by Natasha Belle »

Thank You for the follow-up comments and the support.

Well Covid lockdown has been a bit of a bitch. I'm just over 250 pounds weight and have been since March. At least my weight isn't going up :D but it's not going down either :(

I'm having my third gender clinic appointment on Tuesday when I'll get the Professor's feedback on my plans and hopes. I may be 59 but my face is OK and I'm going to look the best I can. I have noticed my boobs are now much more pronounced and sensitive which feels great. One of my lady friends has already told me that she's looking for a fella for me and that doesn't feel wrong any more. In fact it's making it more frustrating that my exercise options are so limited by this damned lockdown. The same friend is active on Fetlife online and real world and is keen for me to join in as a friend.

Now I have even more reason to get toned and slim. Bugger off 2020 I've had enough. If you actually read this Pauline Thank You for being a good friend to me.
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Gregovic
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by Gregovic »

In a time like this, not gaining weight can be an achievement on it's own. Don't fret too much about it.

What has helped me in the past was simply reducing my portion sizes whenever possible. I didn't really change my diet all that much, but when making something to eat, I'd just make slightly less then I usually would (And when having a snack, for instance put a third of a bag of chips/crisps into bowl and put the rest away instead of unconsciously munching through the whole bag in a single go). Just that step of becoming aware of how much I was eating made a marked difference.
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by Natasha Belle »

Gregovic wrote:In a time like this, not gaining weight can be an achievement on it's own. Don't fret too much about it.
That's a lovely thing to say Thank You :D :oops:
Gregovic wrote:What has helped me in the past was simply reducing my portion sizes whenever possible. I didn't really change my diet all that much, but when making something to eat, I'd just make slightly less then I usually would (And when having a snack, for instance put a third of a bag of chips/crisps into bowl and put the rest away instead of unconsciously munching through the whole bag in a single go). Just that step of becoming aware of how much I was eating made a marked difference.
That's a very good point and one I shall pay attention to. It's easy to over snack when we're effectively under house arrest, the weather's grim, and the days are getting shorter.
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by Shannon SteelSlave »

I wish I could have helped. Maybe someday....
Bondage is like a foreign film without subtitles. Only through sharing and practice can we hope to understand.
A Jedi uses bondage for knowledge and defense, never for attack.
I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T!....I, I mean S-M-A-R-T!
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Gregovic
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

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Natasha Belle wrote:That's a very good point and one I shall pay attention to. It's easy to over snack when we're effectively under house arrest, the weather's grim, and the days are getting shorter.
Very true. Another small tip (and difficult thing to master) is learning when you're snacking just because you're bored and when it's because you actually need to eat something (and when to accept that it's still OK to have a snack anyway :wink: )
How may I serve you? *Curtsey*
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bounddosster
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by bounddosster »

Controlling portion size is a very good point. To help with that we use smaller plates and bowls. Filling a smaller plate tricks the mind into thinking you're having a bigger meal.

I have snaking issues, I use to be able to work away all day and not even think of food but sit me idle in front of the tv and all I want is snacking. Personally, I blame the fact UK tv has become so rubbish and boring over the last few years. We use to have five channels and I could always find something interesting to watch, now we have over a hundred and I can find nothing of interest. That is my number one excuse and I'm sticking to it.

Number two excuse is I'm a biscuit-holic (cookie-holic) and have yet to find a support group.
That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by Natasha Belle »

Gregovic wrote:
Natasha Belle wrote:That's a very good point and one I shall pay attention to. It's easy to over snack when we're effectively under house arrest, the weather's grim, and the days are getting shorter.
Very true. Another small tip (and difficult thing to master) is learning when you're snacking just because you're bored and when it's because you actually need to eat something (and when to accept that it's still OK to have a snack anyway :wink: )
That used to be a huge issue for me. I'd eat little all day then buy a carrier bag full of junk on the way home and eat the lot that evening. Hence topping out at 450 pounds. Very good advice though. Another trick is to have a glass of squash in the fridge. Feeling hungry? Have a mouthful or two and wait 10 minutes. Usually you were thirsty but the signals have been scrambled by years of bad habits.
bounddosster wrote:Controlling portion size is a very good point. To help with that we use smaller plates and bowls. Filling a smaller plate tricks the mind into thinking you're having a bigger meal.

I have snaking issues, I use to be able to work away all day and not even think of food but sit me idle in front of the tv and all I want is snacking. Personally, I blame the fact UK tv has become so rubbish and boring over the last few years. We use to have five channels and I could always find something interesting to watch, now we have over a hundred and I can find nothing of interest. That is my number one excuse and I'm sticking to it.

Number two excuse is I'm a biscuit-holic (cookie-holic) and have yet to find a support group.
Both myself and Pauline I mentioned above were very overweight and she went into dieting plans and groups deeply. They were a waste of space and run just to make money and keep people on unsustainable diets. Eat less, move around around more is best.
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by wayneheidlebaugh »

lj wrote:Just a personal opinion, and I'm not knocking anyone, but a comment on Wayne's post content.

The idea of being locked into clothes is part of a fantasy scenario (nothing wrong with that!) but unless you are into titanium, welding and armour plate, anything locked on can be unlocked, and even those materials will crack if enough equipment is thrown at them!

There are trade-offs.

In a partnered play situation, you can be "forced" to wear some clothes, even locked into them, but BDSM play is always with consent - no consent = abuse =crime. You agree to being "forced".

In solo play, you trade the damage you will cause to your clothes by taking an "unauthorised" release, instead ofthe penalty of using the key on your front gate, or taped to somewhere that means you wait till dark to retrieve it, or the time-safe opens.

I found my opportunity to cross-dress in the company of others by going to play-parties. Attitudes varied from "oh, OK" through to "you look great" but never critical or unpleasant. As I never went to the extent of wigs and make-up, I was always a man in womens' clothes, and only on one occasion, with my then sub/play-partner went for a meal wearing my usual "uniform" but with trousers instead of a skirt. On the other hand, a pal of mine would dress fully, and go into the public domain (even if he did look like what he was, a trucker in a dress - he didn't care!). Or the guys who really went the whole way and you would really have to look VERY closely to guess they were male - they happily went wherever they wished in public.

I think it all comes down to how you look cross-dressed - a passable "woman", you have a lot of self-confidence so you don't care, in a place that accepts cross-dressing, or you keep it solo.

But in the end, do what you enjoy!


Hay, don't get me wrong. I would never force anyone into any situation they don't want to be in. I had a step sister who would harrass me all the time. One time she tried to convince me I was no t really a boy as I knew I was almost since the day I was born. She would ask me the question "Who the hell has been telling you your a boy all these years? I would say "everyone I ever knew." Then she says "Everybody was lying to you. your agirl! Only boys can have babies. I say That's imposible, I can't have a baby. she says Wellthat pruves it, your a girl!' It went on and on for almost an hour but I was never convinced otherwise. I am so glad she never tried to put a dress on me. It's been over 30 years since I've last seen or heard from her and I hope I never have to deal with her again. Anyhow, I like the idea of cross dressing just for fun but I get nervus when it comes to doing it publicly. If a person I trust were to want me to try on women's clothes sure I would go for that. I wouldn't mind having the clothing locked on me as long as I'm told in advance it may get locked on. That could be fun having a dress or skirt locked on so it can't come off then I would have to wear it in public. Portland, OR in Summer would be perfect for that. I might as well have some fun with it. Yeah, Just lock a skirt on me and have me walk home. I don't mind.
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

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In my case, I share some common points with CheerfullyInsane. I don't pretend to become a female at any moment or any temporal instance.
The reason why I crossdress is motivated by the fetish I have on stockings/pantyhose and high heels. They are sexy, comfortable (the stockings, not so the heels :twisted: ), erotic, I like the tight feeling and they drive me nuts. Therefore, my CD wardrobe is also not vast, but highly specific, addressing only my fetish: pantyhose, stockings pairs, garter belt etc...and when I move house (when I start living alone) I plan to enrich it with heels pairs and garter belt corsets. So, although I think woman are very lucky that those clothings belong to their fashion standards, I'm happy that I can use them in my SB sessions to enrich them, or under my usual male clothes when I hang out on the streets. Being kinky in public has its fun.
That said, I don't think I fit in the LGBTQ* or alike labels. I feel the activity I do, with the reasons I do, doesn't fit in any of those categories. I prefer "The regular, average guy who has a fetish for bondage, hose&heels and enjoys wearing them just like someone that enjoys playing a PC game" label. I don't want to become a female, I don't want to wear makeup, I don't feel humiliation by wearing these clothes either because I don't consider myself humiliated when I'm fulfilling myself by wearing stockings or walking on heels. Even when I'm tied up and watch me on the mirror, that's me and I'm perfect.
Labels suck, and each person is unique and it's the motivation why we do X thing that differentiates everyone. The thing I just find limiting is to live with people that would completely freak out if they discovered my hidden fetishes. There's no way my parents/family would accept what I do and I can manage to sneak out and do my things, but I feel that it's when I will live alone soon that the whole experience will get into another level. Can't wait, my wardrobe claims for improvement!

Life is short, we only have one take, there's no reason to not enjoy yourself, so whatever the context or the critics, (manage to) do your thing.
"Self-bondage is my way to relax."
"Bondage is about freeing your mind to experience something greater." :gag:
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bounddosster
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

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A good man once said, "forget the labels just enjoy what you like". He was actually talking about music but I think it applies to life in general. Certainly something I try and do.
That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by wayneheidlebaugh »

gemt wrote:
SissyJuli wrote:What do all of you consider yourselves to be?
Human... in the end, the rest of the labels don't really fit.

Fetish dressing only works while you can play on some negative emotional context while dressed, or dressed in the particular way.

When that goes, due to exposure, then what is left is your true need or likes.
In the wild, male birds are more brightly colored then their female counter-parts, The peacock for example has bright blue-green
feathers and even more amazing is the way he fan out his long tail feathers which looks like nearly 100 eyes staring at you. The female
or peahen is dull and drab in appearance. With humans its the women who are more atcive while men mostly wear plain pants and shirt
plus there is that facial hair they have which some women find less atractive. Maybe it's no wnder some men want to try cross drssing
To try to view the world as a woman sees it or try to connect with their inner femal.
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Re: Types of cross-dressers?

Post by Natybound »

In my particular case my taste for crossdressing is very related to my taste for bondage. I think there's no point in trying to label our tastes because even though they look a lot alike they are never completely the same. There are many shades of gray between black and white. It can happen that by trying to fit in a label we end up convincing ourselves that we are someone we didn't really want to be. I think it's better that we each enjoy our tastes in the best way and don't waste time labeling ourselves.
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