Anonymity vs participation

[bound_jenny]

WOW! goddessloviatar, that is a gorgeous bodysuit!

As far as people in my surroundings finding out about my personal life, well, it's personal! That's why it's called privacy. Even so, there are circumstances that need to be weighed when deciding what can be divulged. A fairly large proportion of former suitors know about my passion for bondage - something that I decided to divulge under very peculiar circumstances, not the free-for-all of the internet.

For Warlock, e-mail addresses are another problem, especially if you only use one for everything. I have two: my "real" one that comes with my internet access account, and one that I have on Yahoo that I spread around - mainly for spam control. And no one has access to my private information in any of those cases. Well, that's only my very peculiar case... and I'm known to imagine all sorts of nonsense.

Grinser has proven my point about probabilities... there are thing that are so common, even names, nicknames, and so on, that narrowing down a list is next to impossible.

My overall point (which seemed to be lost somehow, I did mention it or something to that effect, didn't I? Then it could be my overactive imagination again...) was more centered along the average sicko who would like to find a lovely target to prey on, something that we ladies are a little more sensitive to than most of the gents.

Oh, well, enough said.

Jenny.

[rubberbandballgag]

The anominity is what makes this work so well.

For me, being able to explore and probe this part of my personality and make-up without the risk of ruining my reputation (which at the moment is non-existent anyway) is something that I don't get anywhere else, and although I might not be able to put faces to names, I can still learn a lot from reading the various bits and bobs that are on here.

The thing is, (I read a comment similar in another thread, and I forget which) we are trusting each other with our own deepest secrets and the last thing we want to do is make it easy for others to track us down and make our lives hell. This is something that we don't want people to know about us for whatever reason, which is why we use anominity to hide it yet giving it room to grow as a part of us.

I would love to meet some of the people behind the posts here, but I know that is most likely an impossibility, and even if it were possible, I would only want to talk. I've met people off the internet before in the vanilla world, and it doesn't always go the way you think it will.

I can't say I've seen much (if any) personal info on here about anyone, the best you get on me is a city in the UK, it comes down to what people want to share and what's important, and each of us has our own limits. You'll get nothing from me, but then nobody IRL can get anything from me either.

Finally, if my secret ever did get out:

It is 2008 and there are far more important issues for the human race to deal with instead of what I wear or what I like to do to myself or have done to me.

This also gets an AMEN from me.

[bound_jenny]

The anominity is what makes this work so well.

Exactly.

I've met people off the internet before in the vanilla world, and it doesn't always go the way you think it will.

Bingo.

Finally, if my secret ever did get out:

It is 2008 and there are far more important issues for the human race to deal with instead of what I wear or what I like to do to myself or have done to me.

This also gets an AMEN from me.

Very true.

However, even if the human race likes to think of itself as tolerant and open-minded, you only hear those who actually think like that express themselves along those lines. They are deluded. They live in a fantasy world filled with pink bunny rabbits and candy cane lamp posts and other rot like that. Oh, it would be nice if it were all true - I would be among the first to wish it. But I don't believe it's reality yet.

It only takes one rotten apple who is distracted from the aforementioned important issues to wreck someone's whole day. That is where an ounce of prevention is worth several tons of dirt over my coffin.

If I want someone to mistreat me (in a good way ), it will be on my terms and at the hands of someone I choose. (Why do I have the feeling that I will be receiving several applications for that job?)

Jenny.

[Warlock]

Oddly enough, it's not generally my interests coming out in RL that worries me... everyone close to me knows I'm not entirely sane, and I'm sure some of them have twigged that my tastes aren't standard either. Having a couple of coils of nylon rope lying around must raise suspicions, heh.
I mean if my they can adjust to me having painted nails, they can adjust to most things.

I think it's more that ... in my mind there are separate worlds ... family, work, private life, etc. Perhaps it's a feeling that those worlds shouldn't collide? *scratch head*

My overall point (which seemed to be lost somehow, I did mention it or something to that effect, didn't I? Then it could be my overactive imagination again...) was more centered along the average sicko who would like to find a lovely target to prey on, something that we ladies are a little more sensitive to than most of the gents.

There in lies another pretty big point.

*insert here quoting and agreeing with rubberbandballgag's post*

However, even if the human race likes to think of itself as tolerant and open-minded, you only hear those who actually think like that express themselves along those lines. They are deluded. They live in a fantasy world filled with pink bunny rabbits and candy cane lamp posts and other rot like that. Oh, it would be nice if it were all true - I would be among the first to wish it. But I don't believe it's reality yet.

Most people consider themselves open minded, since most people have a limited view of the whole. If you only know what is vanilla, but are willing to consider a little bondage, you could consider yourself open minded. We who have a broader perspective of the whole know that few are entirely comfortable inhabiting more than a small portion of it.

Then there are the people that consider themselves open minded because they consider their view point to be only correct one. Everyone who doesn't share that view point knows that this view is wrong, even if they themselves are guilty of doing it with a different view point.

To be truly open minded, one must be able to intelligently handle a diametrically opposed point of view and accept that it has as much validity as your own. Since most religions teach a view that precludes this possibility, the chances of the world becoming truly open minded any time soon are sadly slim

</philosophical preaching>

It only takes one rotten apple who is distracted from the aforementioned important issues to wreck someone's whole day. That is where an ounce of prevention is worth several tons of dirt over my coffin.

Exactly

[bound_jenny]

Painted nails, eh?

You're not the only one who has been pegged as eccentric.

My technique involves creating doubt in the minds of those who suspect something. They are never sure if I'm joking or serious. That really freaks them out, and to avoid further confusion and injury in their little brains, they drop the subject. And since I like messing with people's minds, it's fun!

Sure, most people are open-minded and tolerant, as long as it doesn't exceed their comfort zone (oh, I'm not against this or that, BUT....).
That's another form of delusion.

Jenny.

[rubberbandballgag]

it's true, people aren't as open minded as they think, and having recently felt the sting of having 'open-minded' friends turn on me over something so small and petty it's unreal I think there's always going to be the side of someone you don't see until you get on the wrong side of them.

I mean, look at us, for the most part, there's a side of us that we keep to ourselves, and it's reasonable to assume others have thier own hidden facets.

As a fellow mind-fucker, I've spent tons of time proving my friends assumptions wrong, to the point of moving in with a female friend on a completely platonic level, to everyones assumption that there was something going on, that when she got a boyfriend, she was asked if it was me.

Yeah, people assume stuff all the time, it's how people interact with the world. That's another reason we'll probably need to keep our secrets forever.

I'm considered a loner by my friends and I've always insisted its a 'different world' type of situation, I'm just not wired up for 'normality', if they knew I think I'd face an inquisition style intervention. I always figured the best way to be able to be open with all this is to live in a community where it is acceptable. Who's up for building a little village we can all hang out in?


...also, to Jenny: if i lived in canada, this application form would be long gone, but only on the promise of a little return of mistreatment

[Grinser]

it's true, people aren't as open minded as they think, and having recently felt the sting of having 'open-minded' friends turn on me over something so small and petty

Hah, quite funny actually, that my few buddys and me, although being hated all over the place for pissing off everybody, actually are the most open-minded when it comes to stuff like that. Maybe because we all like different kinds of women and treat them very differently, we can actually talk about sexual issues quite openly.

[bound_jenny]

Who's up for building a little village we can all hang out in?

As long as we don't all have to rename ourselves as numbers and greet each other with "be seeing you"! Though I wouldn't mind trying the big white ball thing... Sorry - first thing that popped into my mind about a village... I just loved that Prisoner series... Delightfully mind-bending!

...also, to Jenny: if i lived in canada, this application form would be long gone, but only on the promise of a little return of mistreatment

Be careful of what you wish for...

Jenny.

[rubberbandballgag]

Be careful of what you wish for...

Same goes for anyone else, you want some play buddies, but the sting comes when they've got a hidden agenda and you fall victim of it. Or someone catches wind of your plans and you get rejected from your everyday life.

I wish I knew the prisoner series better, I'd make a reference.

Be careful of what you wish for...

Do your worst, I could use the experience!

[Warlock]

I mean, look at us, for the most part, there's a side of us that we keep to ourselves, and it's reasonable to assume others have thier own hidden facets.

Oh yes, they all secretly dress up as yellow ducklings.

Yeah, people assume stuff all the time, it's how people interact with the world. That's another reason we'll probably need to keep our secrets forever.

I'm considered a loner by my friends and I've always insisted its a 'different world' type of situation, I'm just not wired up for 'normality', if they knew I think I'd face an inquisition style intervention.

Most vanilla people would probably feel a little insulted if they knew we what we thought of "normal" heh.

I always figured the best way to be able to be open with all this is to live in a community where it is acceptable. Who's up for building a little village we can all hang out in?

Brilliant idea! But I have to say.... and I really don't like the show, but I can't resist....

Are you local?

[rubberbandballgag]

Depends where local is for you. Bradford is in west yorkshire, up in the lesser known northern areas of the UK for those that don't know.

That's still a large area, so I've not given too much away there!

It occurs to me that even on stuff like facebook you have to be carful with your details, I've read articles about fraud using information people posted on them. It goes multiple times more for us if we're out in the world on our lonesomes.

[Warlock]

(I forgot to merge the two posts, so it's backward, sorry)

Painted nails, eh?

You're not the only one who has been pegged as eccentric.

Yeah, not exactly subtle shades either heh.
See the thing most of the world hasn't realised is that it's fun being eccentric hehe.

My technique involves creating doubt in the minds of those who suspect something. They are never sure if I'm joking or serious. That really freaks them out, and to avoid further confusion and injury in their little brains, they drop the subject. And since I like messing with people's minds, it's fun!

Sure, most people are open-minded and tolerant, as long as it doesn't exceed their comfort zone (oh, I'm not against this or that, BUT....).
That's another form of delusion.

Jenny.

Oh yes, it's fun messing with peoples minds

[Warlock]

Depends where local is for you. Bradford is in west yorkshire, up in the lesser known northern areas of the UK for those that don't know.

That's still a large area, so I've not given too much away there!

It occurs to me that even on stuff like facebook you have to be carful with your details, I've read articles about fraud using information people posted on them. It goes multiple times more for us if we're out in the world on our lonesomes.

This is a local shop for local people.


Yeah, I don't really like League of Gentlemen, but the quote seemed appropriate

[Michelle]

How substantially do you think you are holding back to protect the separation between your posting identity and your real world identity?

Good question I never really put much thought to it, but I know I'm always careful about what information I give out. At times, if I spend enough time on this forum to get absorbed in posts and excited, I might start typing away and not check as much, but in general I do.
Even though there's only a few of us from Canada in this forum, and Canada is huge, there is always the chance that someone could be recognized.
My employer has offices all over Canada, US, Mexico and several countries in Europe... so how do I know that Jenny (for ex) doesn't work for the same employer??
Not that it would be that big of a deal, as we would keep this secret to others in the company for sure (would we Jenny? ), but I'm just saying there is all kinds of ways for someone to be "found".

[bound_jenny]

so how do I know that Jenny (for ex) doesn't work for the same employer??
Not that it would be that big of a deal, as we would keep this secret to others in the company for sure (would we Jenny? ), but I'm just saying there is all kinds of ways for someone to be "found".

Believe me, if I worked in the same place as you, you would definitely have noticed... But my company is located only here, so don't start peeking into offices to find me

Or am I closer than you think? Look over your shoulder... BOO!

Jenny.