First NYC BDSM party.

Tell us about your latest, greatest, best, worst or simply funniest bondage/selfbondage/chastity/CD experience. Only true stories please!
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smelt
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First NYC BDSM party.

Post by smelt »

7pm. After the last fit trial, the corset is close to done, so it is time to have a few drinks, and chat a bit while the corset is finished up. Around 11pm, the changes have been made and it is ready to go. Quite a few "nerve-calming" drinks are down, and we get in a big, black Chevy Tahoe, with blacked out windows....The Uber driver gives some strange looks at what the girls are wearing, and jokes with us a bit about where we are going.... Arrive at the party entrance, which is a doorway, with a buzzer. We are buzzed in, and greeted by two ladies in latex, we hand over the $100 admission fee for the four of us, and get in the elevator. This is starting to feel like the opening scene from Blade or something. So the nerves start to twinge a bit. The elevator stops, and we walk into a set from a BDSM movie. This is real, and we are doing it. The 4 or 5 guys running the event are huge, scary looking, and dressed in leather from head to toe. But our "tour guide" knows everyone there, so that helps a lot, and the event staff is all very cool once we talk to them. We are shown around the venue, there are several rooms, each with a different theme. Medical, suspension, one room has a cross, a throne, a cage bed, and a guy tied up on the floor with a Dominatrix punching him. Hard. Wow. There are Pro Dommes walking around, carrying floggers, whips, and anything else you can imagine. Looking for clients. There are naked slaves, looking to have scenes with those Women. A couple of very serious looking Masters are in one room, with bullwhips, and a few female slaves, This is getting scary...

So after the tour, we go to a dressing room, where my spandex hobble dress (that is pulled up so it works as a shirt), is pulled down, and the corset is fitted. Lace cover goes on, locked, shoulder straps are pulled back, and locked, but not too tight, then the hood and collar are laced tight. Gulp. The eye cover is fitted loosely, and I am led out into the lounge area. It is like a scene from a western, where the music stops, and everyone stares. We are swarmed by most everyone there, and the questions start. About this time, my eyes are covered tightly, I can feel a few sets of hands felling the corsets shape, then I am led into a room. I can't see, but am told that we are in the room with the cross and the throne. The really nice suspension cuffs we bought at Purple Passion earlier are strapped on my wrists, and I am hooked to the cross, facing in. My Wife asks me if I knew who hooked me up, turns out it was the giant bald guy, who was being whipped on the same cross when we arrived. I try to gulp, but the posture collar doesn't really allow it. I can feel the leather ankle cuffs going on, and feel the snap of the locks on them....

So now I am standing there, shackled to a St Andrew's cross, blind, and being somewhat crushed by the corset. I try to quietly ask my Wife to let my hands down a bit, when a VERY loud voice asks me "Did She ask you to speak?", and I am slapped HARD across the face. Luckily the hood cushioned the -very- unexpected blow a bit. It also moved the eye cover a bit, and I can make out one of the Pro Dommes who was walking around when we got there. She isn't very tall, but has my attention instantly. She notices the eye cover, and fixes it. Dark again. I can feel someone fiddling with the locks on the front of the corset, then the lower laces are loosened a bit. Hmmm... I then feel a flogger handle pushed up into the back of the corset, the unknown Domme asks me if I want that, and I say "no"... Big mistake. I forgot to address Her properly. At this point, I can hear very loud and angry words, but between the music, the hood, and the complete disorientation, I can't make them out. Then the laces are tightened, and the locks are back on. And it is quiet. My Wife gets close and tells me: "Everyone here is looking at you". I can hear a man's voice asking my Wife if he can talk to Her when She finishes with me. About now, I get hit pretty hard with something across the back side. I worry that the corset will be damaged, but don't know if I dare to say anything. So, I stay quiet. This goes on for a few minutes, and I am told again.. "Everyone is watching". It is pretty quiet, and I am quite sure I AM being watched by a big group....

Then, I can hear the crack of a whip, VERY loud, and a girl whimpering with each crack. My Wife and another unknown female voice tell me that it's too bad I can't see the very hot girl being whipped in the same room. I can hear her, but cannot see a thing. A while goes by, and I am finally released, the eye cover is removed, ankle shackles are taken off, and I am led back to the dressing room. Someone gets my clothes from the coat check, the corset is unlaced. I feel like I am going to fall over the second it is unzipped in the front ... I get dressed, and we head back to the lounge area. People are sitting on the leather couches, but get up as soon as they see me coming. I am told that I probably need to sit more than them, and I thank them for that. A drink is handed to me, that I drop instantly, my hands are still shaking badly... the dropped drink goes all over my Wife's brand new boots, and her PVC leggings. One of the other Dommes sees this, and tells me to lick the boots clean, but then takes it right back, as the floors cleanliness is quite questionable. So I have a new drink handed to me, and we hang out and chat until about 4am.... I went into this 99% terrified, and now I have just one question about the whole experience..... When are we going again??????
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bound_jenny
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Re: First NYC BDSM party.

Post by bound_jenny »

Looks like everyone got some evil fun out of this. :twisted:

My kind of fun! :whip: :twisted:

Jenny.
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lj
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Re: First NYC BDSM party.

Post by lj »

Arriving at your first play-party is an amazing experience, all those things you have fantasised about, actually happening!

I remember very clearly my first BDSM event, actually quite "low key" and seeing a Domme thrashing a guy in rubber shorts, then getting a gentle flogging myself, tied between two pillars.

Sounds like the OPs party was somewhat larger than my first one, a great experience. Enjoy the next one !
be a switch, double the fun :-)
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smelt
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Re: First NYC BDSM party.

Post by smelt »

I can easily see how attending these could become addicting. It's kind of like going on vacation.... as soon as you get home, you instantly want a "re-do", because there is so much more you would have done, while you were there. One major thing has changed in me. I am no longer nervous about going to a fetish club, whatsoever. I cannot wait til next time.
KinkInSpace
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Re: First NYC BDSM party.

Post by KinkInSpace »

I'd never go to one of these alone, but if I had a girlfriend with me, definitely something I'd want to do too. :)
Formally known as Slave_L.
I'm not yet very comfortable expressing my love for kink from my private life. I will therefor hide behind my username KinkInSpace and not allow any connections to who I really am. I'm sure you'll understand.
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smelt
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Re: First NYC BDSM party.

Post by smelt »

Slave_L wrote:I'd never go to one of these alone, but if I had a girlfriend with me, definitely something I'd want to do too. :)
All I can say to that is " I wish I had gone to one sooner".

I don't know about the Netherlands, but NYC at 2am is one of the scariest places I have seen. (Parts of it. Some parts are very not-scary). Anyway, I'm not telling you what to do, but I know I will be kicking myself for the rest of my life for not doing this sooner. The party we went to charged admission, but then scenes were free. There were several Dommes there, and they all seemed quite willing to jump in and join a scene if it was wanted. I think that it's like free advertising for them, I am sure they gained a few new regular clients... Everyone there knew that my Wife and I were quite new to the "public" side of this, and were all great about it. I think the crowning achievement of the night was when a few people wanted my Wife to "abuse them" when we were done... She took another 10 steps up the "Mistress ladder" at that moment. A week later, and you can still SEE the difference in Her.

As far as safety, we never heard the house safeword, but were told if it was heard by anyone, help would be there in seconds. That is something that is taken QUITE seriously these days. Consent is huge now. Again, I don't know about other places, but I felt VERY safe in there. We plan to try a few other events when we can. I will do my best to write about them, without giving away ALL the details...
KinkInSpace
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Re: First NYC BDSM party.

Post by KinkInSpace »

Oh, I hear you...

I am more and more getting into being kinky. By that, I mean that I'm starting to accept that kink is part of my lifestyle. Before it was play but always hide. Recently I'm actually starting to date on a kinky style datingsite, although I found out that most profiles there are fake, but this has been a step for me.

I've always sort of wanted this, but also maybe not... But now, I definitely want this, no more questions.

Given how I'm still alone with this, I am still a bit shy to go to munches and stuff like that. My biggest concern I guess is that I fear the pain will be more than I can handle, even though in the back of my mind, I know that my pain tolerance is way higher than most people and that I can take a lot. I punish myself with a lot of pain too, but I always do it at my pace.

I hope to find a girlfriend to have at least one session with (or a lot more of course) before I'll try a munch myself.
Formally known as Slave_L.
I'm not yet very comfortable expressing my love for kink from my private life. I will therefor hide behind my username KinkInSpace and not allow any connections to who I really am. I'm sure you'll understand.
lj
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Re: First NYC BDSM party.

Post by lj »

Slave_L wrote:Oh, I hear you...

I hope to find a girlfriend to have at least one session with (or a lot more of course) before I'll try a munch myself.
I think you have the wrong idea about munches. Unless clearly stated, a munch is simply an opportunity to meet kinky people and talk freely. Most munches are held in a vanilla setting, no fetish wear, no overt kink behaviour, no clue you are anything other than a group of people having a chat. Usually there will be some indication the group IS a munch, perhaps a mascot of some kind on the table, and usually there will be an organiser who you can contact in advance and ask any questions, plus they will introduce you to some of the munch attendees.

The advantage of a munch is that everyone there is at least interested in kink, and if you are looking for a girlfriend then at least you don't have to risk "outing" yourself to a vanilla girl. But don't go to a munch "on the hunt", go to meet like-minded people, get to know them, let them get to know you, and who knows, you may get invited to a kinky party.

As to paid-for events, nothing wrong with that, it costs money (and a lot of hard work) to put on a big event. Again, you may have the wrong impression about the Dommes (or Doms) - many are "lifestylers", they enjoy what they do, and whilst they may also be Pro-Dommes, they are there having some fun, doing what they want to do with willing victims. The Pro-Dommes I know separate their working life from their play/fun life. They don't play as an advertisement.

A mention on safewords. Although an organised BDSM event may have a standard safeword, it is up to individual players to agree a safeword. You can choose to use the "house" safeword, but ultimately the person you are playing with is the one who needs to know what it is, AND stop whatever they are doing if it is used. This trust is absolutely essential. Bear in mind you can't utter a safeword clearly if you are gagged, so an alternative sound or gesture or action needs to be agreed.

There is no standard level of acceptable pain, nor is there any target you must achieve. From personal experience, both receiving and giving, pain thresholds vary person-to-person and for one person, day-to-day, even minute-to-minute,. The style of pain also varies - for example I enjoy the sting of a dressage whip far more than the thud of a heavy flogger, I had a session involving a total of over 300 strokes from 15 different canes and really enjoyed it, but 10 strokes of a light cane administered as a punishment was almost unbearable.

Anyone who says you are a wuss because you can't cope with nnn strokes of a flogger/cane/paddle is an idiot who should be avoided. Anyone who starts a scene with a newbie without agreeing a safeword and discussing the sort of play and establishing any hard limits should also be avoided.

And "hard limits" are things you really don't want to try, and therefore must NOT be used - again, anyone who says they want to exceed your hard limits, or "test" those limits should also be avoided.

so, go to a munch, small steps. Good luck !
be a switch, double the fun :-)
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smelt
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Re: First NYC BDSM party.

Post by smelt »

Lj, that is spot-on. I didn't go too far into the munch thing, just because this was a story area, BUT, we have only been to couple munches, and to concur with what you said, anyone curious SHOULD go to a munch. Our first one was at a restaurant a couple towns over. Just a long table of people, it looked like they all worked together or something. We had a couple of somewhat obvious crossdressers at our table, but nobody in the place said anything. The people attending the munch were probably the most understanding, tolerant group I have ever met. At the end of the evening, a few people asked us what we thought. And before I could answer, one of them answered for us with the line of the year:

"Hey, those are just regular people sitting over there".

We 100% agreed with him. It was a group of regular people, eating wings, pizza, and having a couple drinks together. We went to an after-party. They showed us their playspace, which didn't get used that evening. There was my Wife and I, plus one other "newbie' there, and I think the first party was intended to be more of a "get to know them" thing for everyone that belonged to the group. At the end of it, we were invited back. We attended one more munch since, and had a good time. We are considering hosting an afterparty here at our house sometime in the near future.

So, for Slave_L, and anyone else curious about it, my suggestion is to get out there to a munch or two. They will EXPECT you to be nervous. And if something doesn't feel right, look for another group. Our area is not exactly known for it's "nightlife", or anything fun for that matter, but as we look, we find more people around. I don't like facebook, but Fetlife, even though it is similar, can be your friend when you are looking for events.

On a final note about the munch, our biggest fear was seeing someone we knew. Well, if you think about that.... Just say "Suzy" from the office is there, and recognizes you. She most likely does not want others knowing she is there, either. I think it is kind of an unwritten code. And, back to the actual party, from what we have seen and heard, NOBODY is going to do something you do not want them to. Not at an actual event. My biggest advice is if you do not know anyone, stay 100% sober. Only because the alcohol or drugs may end up agreeing to something you normally would not. And if someone does not know you are intoxicated, things may get out of hand, and it would be hard to blame them.

And, if you decide to go to a pay-to-enter party in a big city... be ready for a pretty serious experience. Ours was at a Professional BDSM photo studio. There was a lot of things to try, and it was all covered by a $25 entry fee. Pretty reasonable, when some of the Dommes there get $300 an hour, for private sessions. So either way, if you are curious, just go. I don't think you will regret your choice. My only regret is not going 20 years ago...
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