Has my husband taken our sex life too far?

Tell us about your latest, greatest, best, worst or simply funniest bondage/selfbondage/chastity/CD experience. Only true stories please!

Has my husband taken our sex life too far?

Postby young_and_bi-sexual » 13 Jan 2018, 02:51

My husband and I have always been a little kinky but he recently suprised me with a matching sets of ankle cuffs, wrist cuffs, collar and blindfold. I thought they were very pretty and were made of leather so they are very soft. I was a little suprised he purchased them for me especially considering how much they cost. I first began wearing them only when we were intimate in the bedroom but soon at my husbands request I began wearing them around the house during the day. It has only been a few weeks but now I am wearing them around the house all day from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed again at my husbands request. The cuffs and collar each have a small key lock which only my husband can open. He has begun insisting that I wear the blindfold during the day as well which renders me totally blind and forces me to rely on him for even the simplest tasks such as getting a glass of water. My husband is the sweetest, most loving man I have ever met and I love him dearly but am confused by the sudden change in his behavior. What should I do?
young_and_bi-sexual
*
 
Posts: 1
Joined: 13 Jan 2018, 02:49

Re: Has my husband taken our sex life too far?

Postby Sir Cumference » 13 Jan 2018, 22:02

Welcome aboard.
:hi:


What should I do?


You should sit down with him and discuss what you and he likes and wants.


And be honest about what your limits are.


(And a lock is still a game berween you and him. Nothing a decent bolt cutter can’t handle)
~ Leatherworking, blacksmithing , woodworking and programming are the most pervertable skills you can learn! ~
User avatar
Sir Cumference
Moderator
 
Posts: 1467
Joined: 29 Jan 2012, 21:00
Location: Scandinavia

Re: Has my husband taken our sex life too far?

Postby Gregovic » 13 Jan 2018, 22:45

young_and_bi-sexual wrote:My husband and I have always been a little kinky but he recently suprised me with a matching sets of ankle cuffs, wrist cuffs, collar and blindfold. I thought they were very pretty and were made of leather so they are very soft. I was a little suprised he purchased them for me especially considering how much they cost. I first began wearing them only when we were intimate in the bedroom but soon at my husbands request I began wearing them around the house during the day. It has only been a few weeks but now I am wearing them around the house all day from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to bed again at my husbands request. The cuffs and collar each have a small key lock which only my husband can open. He has begun insisting that I wear the blindfold during the day as well which renders me totally blind and forces me to rely on him for even the simplest tasks such as getting a glass of water. My husband is the sweetest, most loving man I have ever met and I love him dearly but am confused by the sudden change in his behavior. What should I do?


Talk with him. The most important thing in any relation is communication. Whether it's about the colour of the new couch, your sex life or how you feel. You'll get nowhere if this is not the way you want to live, and not saying so doesn't help to resolve that situation.
My top theory: Everyone is an idiot. Including you and me. Maybe not always or regarding all topics. But sooner or later everyone is an idiot. Make sure you're not an idiot when it comes to your safety.
User avatar
Gregovic
***
 
Posts: 263
Joined: 26 Mar 2016, 20:31
Location: Netherlands

Re: Has my husband taken our sex life too far?

Postby bound_jenny » 14 Jan 2018, 00:07

The rule of thumb is SSC - Safe, Sane, Consensual.

That last bit is very important, so in your case, to answer your question, has he gone too far, so long as you consent, it's OK. But if you don't consent, then it's too far.

As the previous posters recommend, sit down and talk. Don't be shy to defend your limits, and don't let yourself be manipulated into exceeding those limits. If you wish to push your boundaries, it has to be on your terms, with your consent. If you don't feel comfortable about some things you're asked to do, talk about it. If you're concerned about his sudden change of behavior, talk about it. Make sure he understands that anything has to benefit the both of you, not just one.

Play safe!

Jenny.
Helplessness is a doorway to the innermost reaches of the soul.
If my corset isn't tight, it just isn't right!
Kink is the spice of life!
Come to the Dark Side - we have cookies!
User avatar
bound_jenny
Moderator
 
Posts: 7555
Joined: 09 Dec 2007, 11:37
Location: Montreal, Canada, Great Kinky North

Re: Has my husband taken our sex life too far?

Postby TheWingmen » 14 Jan 2018, 00:49

Not to sound like a broken record... but sit down and have a discussion with him.

Discuss both of your likes and dislikes
Discuss both of your soft and hard limits
Make sure everything both of you say is heard and understood by the other.
Discuss safe words if you feel the need for one (I like to fight back and say stop but that doesn't mean I actually want things to stop. Its part of the game for me. So we have a word that would never normally be said that really means stop)

He has taken things too far when he takes them farther than you want to go. You make it sound like he is very kind and caring, so he will understand if you don't want certain things. Kink is the most fun when all parties are enjoying whats going on!

Have fun and stay safe!
TheWingmen
***
 
Posts: 269
Joined: 17 Jan 2015, 01:40
Location: North America

Re: Has my husband taken our sex life too far?

Postby Sir Cumference » 14 Jan 2018, 07:20

He has begun insisting that I wear the blindfold during the day as well which renders me totally blind and forces me to rely on him for even the simplest tasks such as getting a glass of water.


This made me stop for a moment.

If it means that you are practically confined to the house 24-7 and neither of you are working, then something does not add up.
If he wants you isolated and 100% dependent on him, then it is time to be cautious.




Or it could be a fantasy....
~ Leatherworking, blacksmithing , woodworking and programming are the most pervertable skills you can learn! ~
User avatar
Sir Cumference
Moderator
 
Posts: 1467
Joined: 29 Jan 2012, 21:00
Location: Scandinavia

Re: Has my husband taken our sex life too far?

Postby Slave_L » 14 Jan 2018, 20:49

Aside from what has been said already, one crucial bit of information is lacking in this topic yet.

Before anything else, it is important for you to think about this: What is it that you want? Are you okay with it? Do you like it? Do you dislike it? Do you like it, but not all the time?

Only after you have come to this conclusion, do you have enough information to talk about this with him.

He obviously likes to dominate you, and you probably like to be dominated to a certain extend. As a master, he should know that all he wants is to please you, but in such way that it will appear that he is in control. If he does not care for what you want, then caution is definitely advised here.

Do note that if he does not want to listen to you and you are not okay with this new twist, then it may very well end your relationship. Do note, it is definitely a lot better for this relationship to end if this criteria is met rather than to just stick with it and get to the point where things get even worse.

But for all you know he just thinks this is what you want, and in order to know if this is indeed or not what you want, you first need to know what it is you want. Once you do, go have a talk and see where it goes. Be sure to explain why you do or do not want this too.
I'm not yet very comfortable expressing my love for kink from my private life. I will therefor hide behind my username Slave_L and not allow any connections to who I really am. I'm sure you'll understand.
Slave_L
****
 
Posts: 1119
Joined: 24 Dec 2015, 15:11
Location: Netherlands


Return to True Stories

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests