Slip up with a happy ending

[BBinChains]

For the past year I have been into chains and locks. Ropes for me have tended to be too easy to undo knots, slip off wrists and such.

My last "adventure": I have a long chain, with 3/4 inch loops, about 10 feet long, and 3 different types of locks, four A (for appendage), two B (for belt buckle) and two C (for centering), each type is keyed alike. I looped the chain, centered, around the back of my neck, under the arm pits and locked to the center of my back with a C padlock. I put a belt around my waist and locked it with a B lock. I took the two loose ends of the chain, threaded them under the belt in the back, under the crotch, and under the belt in front.

This next part is important to my story. The right side chain I took the the RIGHT, around my right hip and back under the chain above the belt coming out on the left side. The reverse for the left side chain. I then attached the ends of each chain to the corresponding ankle. Playing around with this with the keys in the locks, I thought that this might work.

Originally on this night I was to set up/ plan, and actually follow through on the next night, because I had a big meeting at work the next day. Everything looked so well that as long as I had my release already to go, I might as well go for it. I unlocked the locks from my ankles and got my release mechanism from the freezer.

It was, and is, a plastic bottle with the bottom half cut off. I put a piece of string through the screw top, and screw on the lid with some of the string on the outside, some on the inside. I invert the bottle and fill it with water and then put it in the freezer. When frozen solid I remove the cap, and tie the release key to the string hanging from the bottom.

I took all the keys (including duplicates) and the funnel to the basement laundry room. I tied the marked key to the string and at the last minute, decided to put the rest of the keys on top of the ice, thinking with my wrists/ankles unlocked I can climb on the drier to get to them, since the bottle was clipped to one of the pipes up in the rafters.

I went up stairs to the bed room, turning off all lights and shutting all doors behind me and laid down on the bed. I reconnected my ankles to the ends of the chains with two A locks. This kept my legs from fully extending beyond a 90 degree angle. Next I looped the chain above the belt in front and locked my wrists with the remaining two A locks. Each of these were also connected to plastic ties, the ends neatly trimmed and the scissors were locked with one of the B locks. Lastly, I connected the two halves of the chains together below my wrists, yet above the belt with the remaining C lock.

So the idea was I was locked in a modified hogtie (I'm too old to be comfortable with my hands behind my back). The ice in the basement will melt in about 4 to 6 hours (its cold in the basement), so if I leave the warmth too soon I will be very cold for a while. I will then unlock the locks, but I will need to return up stairs to unlock the scissors to finalize my release, but I can return in a more upright position due to the front C lock giving me more freedom.

So after fits of sleep its 4 am and I decide that the ice in the basement has had enough time to melt. I try to get up from the bed and realize that the chain is much shorter than I expected. I can barely raise up on tip toes to reach the door knob to open the bedroom door. I do, but I have to go on my knees to the top of the steps. I go down the steps sideways to the landing. The lanoleum is murder on my knees. The next set of steps to the basement is taken sideways again, but I decide to duckwalk to the laundry room.

I get to the concrete floor of the laundry room. It is very cold. I feel around in the dark for the key. Whew, it is there! I work the key to my wrist lock. It didn't work, so I tried switching the direction. Nope. Try the other wrist. OMG, The marked key! I dread that I know what happened. I try the C lock. Click. Instead of marking the A lock key, I used the C lock key (which was the first lock to be undone in my LAST adventure).

I lay down sideways, naked and chained, on what used to be a too cold concrete floor, but now made my body, now in a cold sweat, feel good. What am I going to do? My backup release was 911 on the phone on the bed, and I had to go up stairs to get to it. What to do?

Then I thought of the broom that was sitting in corner of the washroom. I got up, grabbed the broom at one end, and now that the center lock is undone, I could reach the funnel with the broom. I hit it several times, finally dislodging the rest of the keys, got the correct key and finished my "adventure".

Whew!